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Website Poles 1.5 Million People, And Apparently New Zealanders Have The Sexiest Accent In The World... WRONG!

(SOURCE)

The New Zealand accent has been crowned the ‘world’s sexiest’ after an international travel website polled their 1.5 million readers.

The Big 7 Travel readers voted for their favourite accents over the past month and while New Zealand led the top 50, it was closely followed by South Africa, Ireland, Italy and Australia respectively.

‘The “Newzild” dialect is outrageously charming. The sexiest accent in the world? It’s official,’ the accent description read.

We talk a lot about accents here at Barstool for whatever reason.  Probably because we have Dente and Rear Ad sounding like they’re straight out of central casting for Good Will Hunting, Eddie sounding like he’s Chris Farley in SNL’s Superfans and KFC because he says “marry, Mary and merry” as if they’re pronounced differently (they’re most definitely not)

But a bunch of dimwitted internet bloggers isn’t a sufficient sample size.  1.5 million people is.  And apparently New Zealanders have the hottest accent in the accent streets these days.  Now wtf is a New Zealand accent?  No idea.  I always just imagined it was similar to Australia.

Anyways let’s break down their top 5

5. Australian Accent

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IMO Australian accents could be the hottest going and I was content with them being in the top 5 on this pole.  This chick is an obvious smoke show.  The only thing is it can come off as a trash bag version of England English similar to how an American southern accent can come off as white trash hillbilly American English.  But if it’s a prim and proper girl talking in Australian, it’s fireee

4. Italian Accent

Nope.  Hard pass.  No thanks on the gabagool accent.  WRONG.  This list doesn’t belong in the top 50 let alone the top 5.

3. Irish Accent

Again, hard pass.  Gross accent.  Still light years better than the gabagool accent though.  The gabagool accent seriously stanks

2. South African Accent

Okay the chick on the right is a complete and total rocket which might be fucking with my brain and idk what the fuck a South African accent is but it sounds like it’s close enough to an Australian accent so I can fuck with this in the top 5, though probably wouldn’t be on mine personally.

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1. New Zealand Accent

Abomination of a “sexiest accent in the world” – it’s trash bag Australian slang.  This is what I meant when I said there’s a difference between a southern belle speaking with a southern twang and some hillbilly who fucks his cousin in Alabama.  Very fine line.  But whoever voted for the New Zealand accent is an asshole.

So who’s the hottest?

This is the correct list:

5. Canadian
4. England English
3. Southern belle
2. Australian

and, drum roll please.

1. Russian

Or Eastern European, whichever accent is below.  I, like many of you, had an obsession with Goldeneye when I was like 10-12 years old and thought that Natalya and Xenia had the HOTTEST voices of all time.