Grading the Newest Sex Scandal Teacher
New Jersey – A Plainfield High School teacher is accused of having a relationship with a 16-year-old student that included daytime sexual encounters in a classroom, authorities said Friday. Jennalin M. Garcia-Calle, 28…was charged Tuesday after an investigation revealed that her alleged relationship with the student, a male, began sometime in December 2012, according to Union County Prosecutor Theodore J. Romankow. “What made this particularly … unusual is that they actually had sex in school, in her classroom,” Romankow said, noting that the alleged activity is believed to have taken place during times when classes were in session. “Evidently they blocked the windows and locked the door.” When Garcia-Calle discovered that school officials had learned of the matter, she traveled… to the Recovery Institute of South Florida in Fort Lauderdale, describe[d] as a drug treatment center that also facilitates healing for sexual compulsivity… Garcia-Calle and the student are alleged to have engaged in sexual relations on at least three occasions… a Twitter hashtag had even been created to share sentiments: #FreeMsGarcia.
There’s an institute designed to you cure you of Sex Scandal Teachering? And they put it in Florida? Smart move. Florida is to SSTs what France is to body odor. Sending teachers to a sexual compulsisvity treatment center there is like sending a crackhead to a rehab hospital in Columbia. You might as well just start booking field trips down to Ft. Lauderdale now because once the Recovery Institute starts filling up with little minxes like Jennalin Garcia-Calle, it’s going to look like Caligula’s palace in there. Believe me though, I’m all for it. Everyone knows rehab places don’t “cure” you of anything. Put a bunch of druggies in one place and all they do is swap ideas and learn how to be better druggies. A hospital for treating these sex-crazed educators is going to be Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters, training them to harness their sexual powers for the good of mankind. #FreeMsGarcia! #FreeMsGarcia!
The Grades:
Looks: She has got to be the most mixed race teacher in the whole glorious history of these grades. Is she Mexican? Filipino? Like if she had video on a porn site, how would they categorize it? “Asian?” “Latino?” My buddy Soog once said that anytime we can’t identify a chick’s ethnicity we always call her “exotic.” I like that. Jennalin is the dictionary definition of “exotic.” And even that weird, centrally located birth mark just kind of adds to her appeal. Grade: A-
Moral Compass/Bad Judgment: Sex in the classroom in the middle of the day makes this a slam dunk. Grade: A
Intangibles: We just don’t get a lot of… ahem… exotics here. That alone would get high marks. But she gets extra credit too. Nothing says you’re a horny little sex kitten like having an escape route to a sex addict center all mapped out. Bravo. Grade: A
Overall: Easy A
[Thanks to @thatsMR_S?] Have information about a hot female teacher having sex with her students? Preferably with pictures? Help make the world safe for Teacher Sex Scandals by Tweeting me @jerrythornton1.