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Just Cut Out Any And Everybody From Your Life Who Even Thinks About Planning Anything For This Sunday


As you get older, you start to feel less of a need to add new people into your life. In fact, it goes the opposite direction. You start to realize that you already have met way too many people and you need to start cutting a few of them out entirely. Nothing personal or anything like that. It’s just that you don’t have time for all of these people who you’ve met throughout the years. Imagine if you kept every single pair of shoes you’ve ever owned for your entire life. That would be ridiculous. Eventually you have to get rid of a few pairs to have space for the two or three pairs that you actually like.

So if you feel like you’re at a point in your life where you need to start seriously considering cutting a few people out, this Sunday is the perfect opportunity to make those cuts. Because if you have anybody in your life who attempts to plan anything on this day, you no longer need to see or hear or speak to that person ever again.

NHL Playoffs. NBA Playoffs. Masters Sunday. Game of Thrones. And if you’re fortunate enough to be from a city with an absolute wagon of a baseball team like the Phillies, you also have some MLB action to squeeze in the mix there as well on Sunday.

This Sunday might be the most loaded day on the calendar in 2019. It might be the most loaded day on the calendar in the past decade. Do you have any idea how much of a selfish prick you’d have to be to make a day like this upcoming Sunday all about yourself?

If somebody has a wedding planned for this Sunday? Skip that shit, it’ll probably end in a divorce anyway, and cut them out of your life entirely. If somebody has a birthday party for their 2-year-old planned for this Sunday? Skip that shit, the kid will probably grow up to be an asshole anyway, and cut them out of your life entirely. Even if somebody tries to set up a watch party for Thrones. Get the frig outta here with that nonsense. Grow the heck up and watch that shit on your own like an adult instead of having to deal with a bunch of jackasses asking questions during the middle of the show and now you’re missing everything important because some other jackass decided to answer the questions instead of just telling them to shut the hell up like a normal human.


It’s a free pass. It’s one of the only chances you’ll ever get to make drastic cuts to your friendship roster without having to explain yourself. If you plan anything on Sunday April, 14, you are cut on the spot with no questions asked. Which only makes this Sunday even better for you. Maybe the greatest Sundays of all time.