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Good News: In Pennsylvania, Heroin Costs Less Than Beer

caulkimn

Source – According to an investigative report published Tuesday, heroin is easier to access than wine and cheaper to purchase than a six-pack of beer in Pennsylvania… Via Reuters: In Pennsylvania, [State Senator Gene] Yaw said a small packet of heroin costs between $5 and $10 and delivers a high lasting four to five hours. The report, based on evidence submitted in hearings across the state this summer, listed Cambria County in central Pennsylvania as having the highest overdose death rate outside of Philadelphia, 22.6 deaths per 100,000 population. That is equal to Philadelphia’s drug death rate, the report said.

Well here I am wasting my funds away on buying booze like a putz when all I have to do is make the switch on over to heroin and I’ll be rich in no time. Saving money left and right, up and down. I don’t even know if this surprises me at all, actually it definitely doesn’t, but it’s still kinda messed up regardless. It’s pretty fucked actually, but how can you compete with $1 per hour highs? Like in my perfect world, we lower the price of booze and then everyone drinks beer and zero people shoot up heroin. Seems like a million dollar, less death, idea to me. But as much as I wish we did, I know that we don’t live in my perfect world and I know that we can’t magically switch the price of a six-pack with the price of a small packet of heroin. So where do we go from here? How do we make sure people don’t accidentally think heroin is cooler than beer since it’s on the cheap? I don’t really know. Maybe have a beer write-off because at least your not buying heroin? That would be cool. If I’m running for State Senate, that’s a part of my platform. Votes on top of votes.

P.S. – Didn’t quite understand the reasoning behind throwing “heroin is easier to access than wine” into the article. Yeah, no shit. Wine is for the Finer Things Club, you idiots.