Georgia Lawmakers Want All Men Under 55-Years Old To Report To Law Enforcement When They "Empty Their Testicles Of Cum"
HB 604 would amend Chapter 1 of Title 35 of the Official Code of Georgia so that “any male 55 years of age or older shall immediately report to the county sheriff or local law enforcement agency when such male releases sperm from his testicles.”
I hate this. Calling to tell law enforcement that I came again would be such a pain in the nuts. I’m all for the regulatory practice of limiting the amount that men can cum. No one likes male cum. It’s sticky and gross and that doesn’t even mention how it makes wash clothes stiff as a board but requiring self-reporting is just a step too far because the state would need so many new phone lines.
I think we should be required to text in.
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“It’s me. I’ve done it again.”
“We know. We got your text last hour.”
“No…. again.”
“That’s the 6th time today.”
“I’m raw and bleeding.”
“All over?”
“Yes but mostly on the left side because I had some dry spots on my radial longitudinal crease.”
“Stay calm. How’s the metacarpophalangeal joint crease?”
“Good, not great.”
“Rub some lotion on it.”
*blogger’s note: I know that not everyone is aware of the anatomical names of the various parts of the thumb so I attached a picture.
In all seriousness, I will never tell people when I cum. That’s something between me and my wife. I havent said anything the first thousand times that we had sex and I don’t plan on starting the next thousand. That’s a promise to you, dear reader.