Lebron Says The Cavs Are Losing Because Of His Teammates Bad Habits And Not Because He's Playing Like Shit, But Don't Worry Guys, He's Here To Help!
PORTLAND, Ore. — LeBron James and his Cavaliers teammates spent the evening engaged in a curious, boring and counterproductive standoff. Look left down Main St. and there was James curled up in silent protest, hoping that his younger teammates would learn to stand on their own two feet. Turn right, and there were Kyrie Irving, Dion Waiters and Tristan Thompson blowing defensive assignments, forcing contested jumpers and failing to match their opponents’ energy as the game slipped away. James never stepped in, and Cleveland fell all over itself in a 101-82 blowout loss to Portland on Monday.
It wasn’t until his post-game comments that James showed anything resembling fire, and even then his harsh assessment was delivered mostly with a smile. “There’s been a lot of losing basketball around here for a few years,” James said, referring to the four straight lottery trips that Cleveland made following his 2010 departure for Miami. “A lot of guys who are going to help us win haven’t played a lot of meaningful basketball games in our league. When we get to that point where every possession matters, no possessions off, we have to move the ball, share the ball, be unselfish, we’ll be a better team. “A lot of bad habits have been built over the last couple of years,” he continued. “When you play that style of basketball it takes a lot to get it up out of you. But I’m here to help.
Man, what a fucking guy. Don’t worry Cavs, your 2 losses this season are because of bad habits. You all just stunk so bad the last 4 years you forgot how to play basketball. And no, I know what you’re thinking, don’t you think it had something to do with the fact that Lebron went 5-15 against the Knicks, 14-30 against the Bulls and 4-12 against the Blazers for a whopping .150% points below his usual shooting average? Or the fact that he’s been playing below average Defense and sort of just floating around the perimeter for large parts of each game? Seriously, last night I watched a couple of quarters and I can’t tell you how many times he would just stand out on the perimeter and not move without the ball. Iso every couple of trips down the court and otherwise do nothing. But Nahhh, that’s not on Lebron, you guys just don’t understand how teaching works, the Cavs are losing because of bad habits not his shitty play. Pretty simple really. If the Cavs win it’s because Lebron taught them how to win, and if the Cavs lose it’s because the guys suck really bad and Lebron is trying to teach them how to stop being so bad but they’re not listening enough. Win-Win for bron bron, what a life.
PS
I obviously know that the Cavs will put it together and will probably roll off 15 wins at some point this year but if you’re a Bulls fan or a Lebron hater you have to relish any time the Super Team isn’t clicking on all cylinders. That’s part of the deal. It was the same in Miami and it’s the same in Cleveland. If you put together a group of All-Stars and you fumble even for a second, the world will criticize. Dems Da Breaks.