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"Vaping Is For Soy Boy Beta Cucks" - Kim Jong-Un, Probably

You can barely step out of your house these days without seeing some punk ass college or high school kid walking around ripping a Juul. But while vaping may be marketed as a…cleaner(?) alternative to smoking cigarettes, Kim Jong-Un is simply not here for that shit. Kimmy J says that he’s here for a good time, not a long time. And if he wants to get his smoke on, then he’s going to grab a pack of Marlboro reds like a man instead of breaking out the vape like some soy boy beta cuck.

You think it’s cool to Juul? Think again, bitch. Kim Jong-Un wouldn’t hit a Juul even if blowing up the entire western civilization depended on it. Sure, Kim Jong-Un may enjoy treating himself to a few margaritas whilst listening to his favorite Katy Perry jams on repeat from time to time…

…but he would never be caught vaping. Plus, we all know that KimJo Slice needs to uphold a god-like appearance to the people in North Korea. Tough news for him is that there’s already a god of vaping, and he goes by the name of Tommy Smokes. So unless we get a Tommy Smokes vs Kimmy Tokes battle for worldwide nicotine supremacy here, Kim Jong-Un is stuck puffin’ on those Marlboros.