WHO THE FUCK IS THIS BACKFLIPPING, FOOT-STOMPING MMA FIGHTER AND WHAT IS HIS DEAL?!

Uhhhh, quick question…what the fuck?

What’s this guy’s deal? He wasted? Did he just step into the cage shitcanned? I mean, don’t get me wrong – I love him. He’s my new favorite fighter. What’s he doin’ though? I’m having a hard time understanding. For one, he’s competing in a OPEN WEIGHT fight – something I wasn’t even aware existed anymore – and oh, he’s literally just doing parkour in there and if one of his limbs so happens to hit Mark Hunt Jr, great. If not – oh well! I’m not even sure that’s his goal. Who gives a flying fuck, though?! I’ll watch him throw running/jumping kung-fu kicks all damn day.

I want this guy signed by the UFC and I want him signed yesterday. Just have him fight a different fatso tomato can to open up every pay-per-view. I guarantee buys go up.