Phil Kessel Is Such A Handsome Young Lad
Every year the Pittsburgh Penguins do some sort of charity gala/casino night type of event. As much as I despise the Penguins, it’s a good thing that they do which ends up raising plenty of money for youth hockey and other activities in the Pittsburgh area. Plus it also gives the boys a nice little excuse to dress up.
Now you look at that group and it’s a decent collection of dapper boys. Obviously your eye immediately goes to Matt Cullen who has that distinguished handsome look. Then you go one over to the left and you have Kris Letang who has more of that pretty boy handsome kind of look. But there is one lad here who is obviously the star of the show. One of these beauties stands out amongst the rest and it’s like a tractor beam for your eyes. You’re just drawn right in there. I’m speaking, of course, about Mr. Phillip Kessel IV. The biggest beauty of the bunch.
I never thought that Matt Cullen would be the person whom I am jealous of the most in this world. But to have Phil Kessel look at you the way he’s looking at Cullen right here? I would kill to have a moment like that with Trilly Kess.
It’s just funny how the world works. I mean think about it. You could have been born at any time in any corner of the world. Yet you were born here and now, and you get to live in the same world as Phil Kessel. There are millions upon millions of people who unfortunately could not say the same. George Washington? Never got to experience watching Phil Kessel be the greatest human to ever walk the Earth. Abe Lincoln? Get real. He had no idea that one day Phil Kessel would become the most influential American in the world. There were a ton of great people throughout history but they’re all a bunch of losers because they missed out on living in the same time period as Phil Kessel. And for that I feel truly sorry for them.