Time For Your Yearly "Three Year Old Joins Mensa" Story

LONDON, Feb. 9 (UPI) — A 3-year-old British girl has been allowed to join Mensa, a society for people with high IQs, becoming the club’s youngest member, officials said. Alice Amos has an IQ of 162 — higher than those of Albert Einstein and Steven Hawking, both of whom had IQs of 160, The Sun reported. “It is clear that she has the capacity to do almost whatever she wants in life,” said child expert Joan Freeman. Alice achieved the high score in English, which is actually her second language, after Russian, which her parents speak in their home in Surrey, The Daily Star reported. The 3-year-old girl is now one of 18 preschool members of Mensa and is in the top 1 percent of the population of the world.

Every year we do this. Every year there’s one or two stories about some snot-nosed know it all who still shits in their fucking pants but some nerds declare them smarter than Albert Einstein and Benjamin Franklin. First there was Anthony who could do puzzles.  Big fucking whoop. Then there was little Emmelyn. Remember her? She was the youngest member of Mensa at the time because she memorized all the insects and all the planets. You know what else she did? She went on live television on the Today show and told the whole world she needed to take a shit.  So this year we’ve got Alice. Another spaz who knows two languages so Mensa is cumming in their nerdy pants over her. Hey Mensa have we not learned anything? Did Emmelyn’s disaster not embarrass your society enough? Maybe we should wait until these kids can control their bowels before we go admitting them to the most prestigious club in the world, huh? Yes I’m very impressed you can speak Russian and English but until I know for a fact you’ve mastered the basics of using the bathroom, you are not as smart as me. Should be a negative 100 point hit off your total score.