Nothing like Usain Bolt reminding the world he is still the fastest motherfucker on the planet on a Saturday morning by putting up a number only the fastest freaks to run at the NFL Combine could touch after months of training while in their early 20s.
Now I’ll admit, I don’t know how official that time is. I’m not one to say how accurate the radar gun or stopwatch at one of these events is. That’s a debate for Carrabis and White Sox Dave to have. But still, Usain Bolt going stride for stride with John Ross at the age of 32 while still wiping the coal out his eyes in blogger attire is proof that dude is not from this planet or even galaxy, which is pretty much one step short of doing a Willy Mays Hayes.
Usually Bolt has to wait 4 full years for the world to care enough about track & field again so he can show off and do stuff that makes our brain melt. But I guess he realized there would be a track, a clock, and some cameras at the Super Bowl Experience and did awesome Usain Bolt shit again. I know Bolt has never played a down of football in his life, but some team should put some pads on him and at least give him a tryout (most like BB of the NEP). And if that won’t happen because Bolt likes his brain without a side of CTE, the people at EA Sports should 100000% add Usain Bolt in next year’s game, even if it’s just for that Ultimate Team mode they do. I would love to put that cheetah in kickoff returns and take it to the house every other time.
Anyway, I hope everyone from Barstool left Atlanta this morning because it would be a real shame if Usain was showed up by anybody in our merry band of misfits.