4th of July Collection | Now Available at the Barstool StoreSHOP HERE


Danny Ainge Had A Lot To Say This Morning So Allow Me To Sift Through The Bullshit

Boston Celtics First-Round Draft Pick Robert Williams

Earlier this morning Ainge went on Toucher & Rich for his normal weekly radio spot and safe to say there was a lot to talk about. You see with Kyrie hurt nobody has had a chance to ask him about all the LeBron/AD stuff, and this was also Ainge’s first public appearance since the news broke as well. Now the thing with Ainge is you always have to read in between the lines to get to the meat of what he’s saying. This man is a master at spinning anything that comes his way, and thankfully I’ve had decades of experience decoding his fluff and hearing what he’s actually saying without technically saying it. So what we’re going to do is go through his quotes from this morning and I’ll tell you what he really means

Yeah OK Danny. I’m to believe there is any sort of information about this whole ordeal that you don’t have? Here’s what he means. He means everyone is trying to figure out what he offered NO but he’s not saying shit. You’ll never get it out of him no matter how many times you ask

Translation: I have gigantic testicles and I am not afraid of anything. If I deem the player worth the risk I will do whatever it takes to bring him in. That is how I live my life and it’s how I will always run this team. Some GMs are scared little bitches, I am not one of them. You will not win a game with chicken with me, ever.

I already have a commitment from him but I can’t say anything due to league rules. I don’t care what that snake Rich Paul leaks to his puppets, Kyrie and I have already gone over the blueprint of bringing in AD. 

I absolutely saw the video and know exactly what you’re talking about. I very much care about all that stuff. We know LeBron is trying to steal Kyrie from us and it is our #1 priority to make sure that doesn’t happen. In fact as soon as I saw it I called Kyrie since we talk everyday. I sort of screwed myself here because I started the quote saying I had no idea what that was but then ended it by saying people bring me that sort of stuff in the media. Please move onto the next question.


My name is Trader Danny for a reason. You damn right you’re on the trade block at all times, that’s nothing new. I have no problem saying it to a players face because they should know that already. Again, I’m no bitch, I keep it real at all times.

Yeah, if it gets me Anthony Davis they’re both gone. That’s tough for them but also the truth. Welcome to the NBA. 

I fucking hate it. It ruins my leverage and ultimately puts me in a position where I may have to overpay. This situation is especially bullshit because we all knew the deal already. This was just LeBron trying to force the Pelicans to act early, and now it’s a whole shit storm. Everyone knew Davis was leaving, he didn’t need to mention it during the year and fuck everything up


I don’t give a shit what Davis says about where he’ll resign. I’ve been here before and chances are once Davis sees the plan Kyrie and I have cooked up he’ll want to stay. Again let me stress to you I am not afraid of making this deal without a longterm commitment. You bring in good players in a good culture, they’ll stay. At least this is what I tell myself before I go to sleep every night because deep down I have no idea if it’ll work on players not past their prime.

Sure there have been times when Hayward has been a liability but what am I to do I just gave him a shit ton of fucking money and I’m stuck. I’ll go with the change in role theory because no one can debate that his role has changed. But yeah, you’re damn right I’m concerned considering he was a pretty major piece of this whole puzzle. Please stop asking me about Hayward’s struggles. Please.


You ever hear of trade value? Yeah, I need these two to continue to play this way because I need the rest of the league to be impressed with them so I can Jedi mind trick them into giving me what I want without giving up too much.


So what did we learn? If you were paying attention it’s that Ainge is 100% aware of what’s going on with LeBron, he knows Hayward has done more harm than good but he’s stuck, he’s not afraid to take a risk, and he needs Terry’s/Jaylen’s value to be as high as possible because they are most likely key pieces in any Anthony Davis deal. Always remember that while it may seem like Ainge is honest and open when he does these interviews you have to be on high alert and pick up what’s not there. That’s understanding Danny Ainge 101.