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Carrabis Saying He Doesn’t Call Himself “The Rocket” Could Be The Biggest Lie Ever Told In The History Of Language

I have comfortably sat back and watched White Sox Dave and Carrabis go at it the past month over pitch speeds and velocity. It’s been a real treat to say the least. I’m not here to talk about that because I find it hard to believe a guy who goes around telling EVERYONE he threw a no hitter against Revere and gave himself his own nickname, which has to do with throwing a baseball very hard, would not be able to get over 75 mph. I’m giving Jared the benefit of the doubt here and waiting for his second chance for him to prove people wrong. I’m not here saying I throw harder than him. I also don’t tout my arm as the second coming to Nolan Ryan’s meanwhile Timmy Wakefield’s knuckleball clocks in faster than Jared’s number 1.

Now what I do have a quarrel with is Jared saying on CCK today that he doesn’t call himself “The Rocket.” Jared has this remarkable ability to immediately forget what he said 5 minutes prior, but this…THIS is next level. If you followed Jared around for a full day there’s a good chance he says “The Rocket” more than the word “I.” No one called him “The Rocket” before he did. That’s something he made up in his head all by himself 100%. My nickname is Hubbs. A baseball coach gave it to me when I was in middle school and it’s been that way ever since. That’s usually how nicknames go in this world.

Jared saying he’s never called himself “The Rocket” is pretty much the biggest lie ever told in the history of spoken language. It took me no less than 30 seconds to find countless instances of him calling himself this, to no surprise at all.

We all know what he’s doing. Now that “68 Gate” is the hottest controversy in the streets he’s trying to ease up on the nickname for damage control. Not going to work my friend.

If I really wanted to waste my time I’d create a one hour compilation video of him calling himself “The Rocket” on radio, podcasts, videos, but I’d rather do literally anything else in the world than that. ANYTHING.

Pitchers and catchers report in two weeks. We’re almost there, folks.