I’m not sure if the rumor about Bryce Harper’s next team being announced by whatever jersey he is wearing in the next MLB The Show commercial are true or not. But I do know that rumor is everywhere. I bet Smitty and every Phillies fan has their notifications on for @MLBTheShow tweets because they root for a team that wants to sign a 26-year-old player about to hit his prime that won an MVP at the age of 22 and hit 34 bombs last year while also leading the league in walks. My team doesn’t appear to be interested because they are owned by schmucks, but c’est la vie.
Regardless, all eyes are on the MLB The Show Twitter account as we wait for the hot stove to drop a fireball on our heads and what do they do? Drop a Bartolo Colon ad on our heads. And not just any instance of Bartolo Colon from his 100 years of playing baseball, but the Mets version that turned Bartolo Colon from a hero to the legend we now know as Big Sexy (shout out KFC for giving Tolo that name). And we all know that heroes get remembered but legends never die. Big Bart has played on three (3) other Major League Baseball teams since he moved on from the Mets, yet they are still using his time in Flushing to move units. That’s the mark of true greatness. Bryce Harper gets you in the door and to your seat while Big Sexy gets you out of your seat and to your local Gamestop by reliving the greatest moment in Major League Baseball history.
Obligatory Natural mashup:
Brodie, if you are reading this, which I imagine you are because you are likely not talking to Bryce Harper’s agent with a last second contract offer, please bring back Bartolo. My wish list goes:
1. Manny Machado
2. Bryce Harper
3. Bartolo Colon
Sure there is a HUGE gap between 2 and 3, but I still hope the #BringBackBigSexy movement gains some steam, which I imagine it will after the Mets let two other free agents in their prime get signed by other teams before we slough through another disappointing season that could have been different with an MVP level bat. In the meantime, I am just going to sit on Twitter and for the Bryce news to drop so I watch chaos unfold in real time.