Welcome Back To The PornHub Comments Of The Week
Well, my friends, it’s been quite some time. But it pleases me to announce that the Pornhub Comments of the Week are back, at least for the time being. I can’t promise that this is going to be an every week type of thing and that’s for a couple different reasons. Reason #1 being the fact that there’s not always going to be 10 comments per week that are worth sharing and after a while of doing this repetitively, they start to get old. The 2nd reason is one that I’ve said before but people don’t understand the mental and emotional toll scrolling through the comment section on Pornhub will take on a man. I mean everybody watches porn, that’s a fact. But it takes a certain type of person to not only watch the video, but to then create an account just to comment on said video–most likely with dick still in hand. So for every 1 comment you see on this blog, there were at least 40 different ones I had to scroll through that all make you lose a little more faith in humanity each time.
But I think it’s been at least a year since I’ve last done one of these so hopefully we have a few weeks here before I need to take a mental break again. And with that in mind, let’s let the freakness begin.
The government shutdown is affecting a lot of different people right now and the porn industry is no different. These are hard working people who can’t afford to pay their bills this month all because a bunch of elected officials in Washington are acting like children and can’t come to an agreement. Makes me sick. Luckily there are still some good people out there in the world like this stud who fronted this nice woman’s rent check for the month.
The “gimmick” commenters on PornHub usually wear out their welcome within a week or two. But I’d be lying if I said I didn’t laugh at this one. Plus it gives me an excuse to finally post this video.
I think the key to becoming a mega star in the porn industry is to just have a dad who remarries a shit ton of times. Obviously business is boomin’ in the stepmom category so the more stepmoms you have, the more videos you can make. Seems like a pretty foolproof plan to me. You wanna make it in this biz? Make sure your dad gets divorced a lot.
I can’t be the only person who has ever had this idea but I really think that the post-porn genre could really take off. There doesn’t even need to be any nudity or anything like that. Just start to make some videos about what happens after the porn. Like how does the rest of their day go after getting tugged off by their stepmom? Does this dude ever get his slice of pizza? Does the flat tire ever end up getting fixed? These are the things that we need to know. And again, you could even air these videos on basic cable. No need for any more fucking, just tell me the rest of the story because there’s so much more to it.
Really love this move right here. If for any reason you’re asked if you’ve ever been in an orgy, you can now say you’ve been in plenty of them. It just so happens that they were when you were hanging out with your friends and nobody was actually doing any banging. But it was an orgy nevertheless. I’ve been in a buttload of orgies apparently.
Damn. Some guys just have all the luck, huh? I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that this fella over here is somehow related to a prince in Nigeria who wants to give him $500,000. Must be nice to be that lucky in life.
That’s the thing. People always try to say that pornstars aren’t real actors or real actresses. But they’re out here putting in just as much work to prepare for their roles as anybody in Hollywood. You think Ben Afleck would go out and get a sunburn just to make a character he’s playing in a film more realistic? Shit no. But this woman did, and that’s why she deserves the same amount of praise as someone like Meryl Streep.
I…I just…I don’t even know what to say about this one. What even would a dude pussy be? Your butthole? I don’t know. Game recognize game though. Gotta at least appreciate the respect being shown there.
For real though, shoutout to the IRS for giving everybody the heads up. I know that when you’re cranking off you’re probably not too concerned with your taxes and most likely you just completely forget about them. But then right before you hit the ‘x’ at the top corner of your screen, there’s the IRS with a friendly reminder to report your finances so you don’t end up getting fucked by the law and audited. The IRS are a bunch of real ones.
Really have to appreciate the honesty from Kingwaxer here. I feel like a lot of people out there would just chastise this woman for banging her friend’s husband without mentioning that they nutted to the video first. But Kingwaxer is going to be a liar when he’s calling out a philanderer. And I think that level of honesty really adds a bigger impact on to his complaint. Sure, he nutted. But he admitted that he nutted. And now it’s time for everybody in that video to admit that they’re disappointed in themselves for engaging in extramarital affairs.
And that’s going to wrap up this week in freaks. Thanks to all for joining in on the festivities. I hope you enjoyed the ride and I hope you can all leave here learning a little something new about yourselves. Have a great weekend, boys and girls, and don’t forget to stay sexy out there.