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Bambi Is Sick And Tired Of All These Lance Armstrong Wannabees, Takes Out Cyclist With A Low Hit

I don’t hate cyclists with the same passion that a guy like Feitelberg does. Because I enjoy getting from point A to point B via bicycle. That’s for a few different reasons. 1) It’s decent cardio work. 2) You don’t have to worry about finding parking. 3) You can do it while you’re drunk, unlike operating a vehicle. So I don’t hate bikes in the slightest. I actually think they’re one of the more important inventions of all time.

With that being said, I never understand why amateur cyclists feel the need to dress up like they’re racing in le Tour anytime they wake up on a Sunday morning to do a little ride with their local cycling club. It would be like if you went out to a local park to throw a football around with your friends on a random Sunday morning and everybody decided to wear full football pads.

So sometimes some people just need a quick little reality check. And that’s what Bambi over here was able to provide.

Granted, the hit seemed to be a little low. Definitely looked like the deer knew what he was doing here and was targeting the knees. But you know what? Sometimes it’s worth taking a penalty if you send the right message. And this deer was sick and tired of all these Lance Armstrong wannabees constantly bombing down his hill. Either get more athletic and race on a pro circuit, or quit dressing up in spandex and just take a ride through your neighborhood like a normal person.

Hopefully the rest of the deer in this fellas squad pitch in and help pay the fine that he’s inevitably going to face for that hit. What do you even call a pack of deer anyway? Are they a herd? Either way, you have to imagine he’s a big locker room deer within his herd so I just hope they all take care of him in return.

@BarstoolJordie