Apparently A LOT Of Englishmen Beat Their Women After England Gets Knocked Out Of The World Cup

Well, that certainly went dark real quick. I was expecting some sort of a punchline at the end, but nope. English wife beating statistics right in your face. What is this the Middle Ages over there? You can literally see the soul drain out of her eyes. Poor girl is waiting for her husband to come home acting like he’s King Richard The Longshanks and is going to invade her face with his fists. Relax, Brits. Like every World Cup you knew going in you didn’t have a chance.

Your country losing the World Cup is not justifiable for domestic violence, but there may be some reasons out there to hit your partner. You just don’t do it because, you know, you’re fucking sane. As always, Bill Burr sums it up best:

God help whoever Hope Solo is dating when the US gets eliminated. Poor guy’s balls are going to be in a glass jar. And I’d still take that beat down with pleasure.