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50 Things Women Want

Daily Mail - It is said the best things in life are free. And it would appear that still rings true for many women. Cuddles and compliments are at the top of a list of 50 things that make a woman feel good. But splashing out on a lady won’t go amiss; being bought flowers and presents are some material things that they enjoy. They also get a buzz from treating themselves to a bargain, or pushing the boat out for new perfume or sexy underwear. Eating cheese, buying a new nail varnish, having clean teeth and shopping for a bargain also put girls in a good frame of mind, the study found. Having time for a jolly good chat with their friends and unexpectedly fitting into an outfit they thought was too small also makes them smile. The top of the list includes compliments about what they are wearing or how young they look. A spokesman for Sainsbury’s, which commissioned the ‘feel-good factor’ poll of 2,000, said: ‘In January, we all need a pick-me-up but as this survey shows, it doesn’t need to cost the earth. ‘With the average female stating she feels good in what she is wearing for just three days a week perhaps a few more surprise compliments, alongside tucking into a good camembert and a good book could brighten the winter months no end.’ The survey results included some interesting revelations  about the things that really make women tick.

50 things. 50 fucking things. 50 shades of shit broads want. I don’t think I could name 50 things I want right now if I tried. Here’s a list of the shit dudes want:

1. Blowjobs

2. Buffalo wings

3. A straight son

4. Ability to dunk a basketball

5. Control of the TV remote.

6. More blowjobs

And thats it. I’m sure you can expand a little bit but in its most basic form we want rocks, food, athletic ability, television, and no daughters. Thats the desires of the male gender in a nutshell really. If you could sign for that at age 13 everyone man on the planet would take it. But here we have chicks – parading around asking for fuckin unicorns and ponies and shit. I mean look at some of the stuff on this list. #2 is comfortable underwear and 3 goddam spots later is sexy underwear. Make up your mind you fickle bitches! You want granny panties or permanent wedgies? “Recycling clothes?” What does that even mean? Like wearing hand me downs? Oh yea thats RIGHT at the top of my list for things I want from the world. “A child thank you for having them to tea?” I’m just gonna go ahead and chalk that up to some weird British thing since this is from the Daily Mail because that shouldn’t even crack your top 50,000,000,000 of things you want. “Eating cheese” and “Watching a DVD set” is about the only thing on this list I can get down with. And wearing sexy underwear.

PS – “Winning a debate” may be the single biggest difference between a male and female list. I don’t give a fuck about “being right” or “winning a debate” anymore. I will let chicks think they are right 100% of the time as long as that results in them shutting the fuck up faster.