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The Saints Pretty Much Locked Up The NFC Championship Now That Jimmy Buffett, The Ying Yang Twins, Cheap Trick, And Choppa Are Performing On Game Day

Who dat? Who dat? Who dat say they gonna beat dem Saints with that Mad Libs of a musical lineup? Noooooobody! Sean McVay can take his photographic memory and ability to whisper sweet nothings into Jared Goff’s ear until 15 seconds remain on the play clock and shove them up his ass. Sean Payton just showed why he is the reigning King of the Seans by putting together that musical lineup straight from an iPhone’s shuffled playlist. Simply having the Parrot Heads on your side after what I’m sure will be an electric rendition of the National Anthem was probably all the juju the Saints needed to go with all their talent and ridiculous homefield advantage. But stacking Cheap Trick, the Ying Yang Twins, and Choppa on top of the Buffman is straight up unfair. Name another place where you could hear “I Want You To Want Me”, “Margaritaville”, “Salt Shaker”, and “Choppa Style” all on the same day? You can’t. There are certain games that you know are over by the way the anthem is done. New Orleans has long been America’s home for voodoo and Sean Payton apparently cooked up an extra spicy pot of good luck gumbo before the biggest game in Nawlins in almost a decade. Because if following up a National Anthem by Jimmy Buffet with a performance of The Whisper Song at halftime as 74,000 crazed Saints fans scream “Wait til you see my dick” doesn’t appease the Football Gods, nothing will.

And if we somehow get a “Salt Shaker” remix where The Buffman flies down from the rafters and adds in “Searching for my lost shaker of salt”…

P.S. I guarantee if the Saints are somehow up BIG at halftime, Payton goes for the jugular and has Teddy Bridgewater come out to dance to Choppa Style halftime.

Scared money don’t make money and a dude that has Taysom Hill throwing bombs and running fake punts during the Divisional Round ain’t scared of a jinx in an effort to turn the Superdome crowd into legitimate rabid people.