Porn Study Scrapped After Researchers Unable To Find Any Male Participants That Don't Watch Porn

Daily Mail- A study into how porn affects men had to be scrapped and radically rethought after experts failed to find any young men who had not watched it. Originally researchers at the University of Montreal wanted to compare the behavior of men who viewed sexually explicit material with those who had never looked at it all. Professor Simon Louis Lajeunesse says he had to drastically rethink his study after failing to find any male volunteers who had never viewed porn.  ‘The objective of my work is to observe the impact of pornography on the sexuality of men, and how it shapes their perception of men and women,’ Lajeunesse said.  ‘We started our research seeking men in their twenties who had never consumed pornography but we couldn’t find any.’

Hey Doc, good luck with that study! The control group for that experiment might as well just be a bunch of dead dudes. “We are studying the affects of oxygen on human males – here are 20 men who breathe oxygen and here are 20 dudes who are fucking dead because they don’t use oxygen and you need it to live.” Basically the same thing. Seriously at this point porn is right up there with air and water and sunlight and all the other standard things you need in order to survive on earth. Whenever the news is like “New NASA rover discovers clues that Mars may have running water to support human life” I’m always like yea, yea, yea running water, temperate climate, blah blah blah. Do they have streaming porn? Thats the key to intergalactic expansion. Its a human necessity. Without it, you’re banished to a life of using your imagination to masturbate. Condemned to recollecting your own mediocre sexual moments while crackin stick. Wasting precious minutes of your life waiting for an erection to arise because the only material you got to work with is remembering the time you had short-lasted missionary sex with a 6 last weekend. Seriously if you add up all the all the minutes you would waste while masturbating naturally, that would add up to like 40 years of your life. 40 years gone. I’m probably only gonna live till I’m 35. If I didn’t watch porn I’d already be dead.