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Marry Marry: Idris Elba Vs. Taylor Swift

Fun little game I just invented. It’s like Marry, Fuck, Kill except you just get to marry both people.

As everyone knows, I’m one of Taylor Swift’s biggest fans. I’m also one of Idris Elba’s and was one of the earlier adopters of the Elba should be Bond idea, so early in fact that I’m actually trying to find a new guy because this bandwagon is too full. I’m an Elba as Bond hipster and I won’t deal with the mainstream fandom. So, seeing them both walk out together (to hand an award to A Star Is Born, no less!) was quite a moment for me. Very invigorating.

I came up with this game while I sat on the couch by myself trying to decide who I revered more.

“Gotta be Taylor. That Red album, though. That’s still in heavy rotation,” I said.

“Yeah but we just started watching Luther for like the 5th time, definitely Idris,” I replied.

“But Our Song was your song with a girlfriend one time,” I quickly rebutted.

“Ummmm The Wire, dude. You haven’t even seen it, but still,” I told myself, citing a show I hadn’t seen and taking me by surprise.

I came back with, “You’re gonna sit here and tell me you don’t sing End Game almost daily,” to which I had to concede.

“What about Obsessed? We wouldn’t have that classic Michael Scott line, ‘I am Beyonce, always,’ without Idris. Oh, by the fucking way, he was also Charles Miner in The Office.” Wow. Double whammy from me, I did not expect that.

“1989, SPEAK NOW, FEARLESS, TAYLOR SWIFT, HER SELF-TITLED ALBUM!” I screamed.

“THOR, THE AVENGERS, PACIFIC RIM, THE LOSERS, A VERY UNDERRATED FILM!” I insisted.

In order to put a stop to the screaming match and prevent the inevitable, Liar Liar type fistfight, I decided to invent Marry or Marry. So congratulations to me, I’m marrying Taylor Swift and Idris Elba. May we live happily ever after…