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This Was The Worst Loss Of My LIfe

I’d like to apologize for not buying Cody Parkey enough beefs this year. THATS ON ME. If I did, maybe he doesn’t miss 11 goddamn kicks and send us home on what should have been a very makeable field goal to win the game. I’m obviously beyond pissed:

And it’s going to take some time to get over. I got people calling me racist (?) and asking me if I’m beating my wife who I happen to love a lot and quite honestly I’m up to my eyeballs. No. I am not a racist for hating Cody Parkey. No. I am not beating my awesome wife. I’m just a 31 year old guy who gave up his notably promising career 2 weeks ago to follow Dave Portnoy. Just a guy who gives a fuck. Excuse me for having passion for something that means SOMETHING to me. I’m sure you have bigger fish to fry like that thing no one gives a fuck about that you bring up on Facebook. Seriously, fuck you.

I’m not the only mad Bears fan. Have you seen this?

Or this?

Or this?

The only person who hates themselves more than me and you right now is Cody Parkey. And even then that’s an exaggeration because this entire city is ready to explode. For that, I’m very very v sorry for anyone cramming into a cube tomorrow prior to 9am. Thoughts and prayers You might be the only people in this city that have it worse than Cody Parkey.

Wait til next year – The Cubs Guy.