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Chicago Dogs Of The Week Taking You Into The Weekend

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Helllloooooooooo my frens again. I missed you SO SO much. I’m so excited to see you and smell you OMG you smell so good what is that nutmeg? I ate a jar of that stuff a couple weeks back and my humans were NOT happy. Apparently I ruined the eggnog but Dad said it was okay because the whiskey drowns it out anyways and he would just use more. Oh well. I don’t even like nutmeg and Dad didn’t even remember it happening.

I can’t believe it’s already Friday! I bet you worked so hard like good boys all week and are ready for playtime this weekend. Maybe you’ll be lucky like me and get to sniff and eat some butts all weekend. Dad says its a bad habit.

ANYWAYS I’m so happy to share all of my frens with you this week. There are so many to share but Dad said I could only do 10. Don’t tell him but I picked way more.

HERE THEY ARE OMG OMG OMG OMG

These are my best friends. I love them very much.

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This is my friend Bruce The Bark Knight. Dad says he looks like a left tackle but moves like a wide receiver. I have no idea what any of that means. Our Dads say shit like this allllll the time.

Merry Christmas BeBop. If you chew on the tree lights hard enough the big red trucks with the alarms could show up but then dad will get mad because of the hot red stuff that ruins everything that gets so hot. I think its called FIRE HOLY FUCK THERES A FIRE. That’s what Dad said when I called the big red trucks to come to the house to play. Dad was mad but I made a lot of new friends.

White Sox Dave told me to tell you that he hates your scarf but likes your human. I’d keep that between us.

HI HANK CAN YOU TAKE ME TO THE BUTCHER SHOP PLEASE

Ernest Hemingway final answer

Oh my fucking god is that for me where are you can you come to Ukranian Village by 3 I can sit and give you all the paws you want omg give me that meat

I want to lick you and nip you and smother you with love Madison or Fido or whatever you want me to call you

Heyhowyadoin

You ain’t nothing but a good boy, smiling all the time!

Ernie Banks slashed .274/.330/.500 in 10,395 career plate appearances while posting a 122 OPS+ and 512 career Yabos. Dad made me learn that before sitting.

Dad told me to just call you J. Toews and to ask if you want your belly rubbed. I already said yes so can you come over and play tonight?

I know a lot of Rizzos that love to go to bars. Hi Rizzo!

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Hi Kona. Hope you like .500 baseball and hot sauce!

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It’s better trust me I love you


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Hi Milo. I ate a blanket that looked like you last week. I can’t remember if it tasted good but I had so much fun.

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HALAS LISTEN TO ME VERY CAREFULLY YOU ARE IN THE KITCHEN AND THERE IS FOOD CLOSE. DONT MAKE ANY SUDDEN MOVEMENTS. THERES A BIG BOX WHERE HUMANS STORE ALL THE FOOD BEFORE THEY THROW IT OUT.  GO TO THAT BOX AND SIT. GOOD BOY. THANK ME LATER.

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I already miss you guys so much. Thanks for hanging out with me. I have to poop now. BYE!

Love,

Scottie Puppen

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