Greetings my frens. Allow me to introduce myself.
I love treats. If you have treats tell me now because I will sniff them out.
Anyways my name’s Scottie Puppen and I am a v good boy according to my human guy Barstool Carl. He tells me that a lot. But then he asks me too. He says whos a good boy and then he says you’re a good boy. It’s very confusing and now I think I smell a treat. I’m picking up notes of meatloaf. You better not be holding out on me.
Anyways I know you had a long week. It’s Friday and I thought you might want to say high to some of my frens before the party starts for the weekend. If you have any treats now would be a good time to tell me thank you for reading this message,
Charter Member #NoBarkFriday
Listen to my human plz guys I want to show you off okay let me start:
Don’t get in a fight!
OMFG TREATS RIZZO GET THE FUCKING TREATS
Let me get a taste
Hey you’re the guy who just pee’d where’d you get that stick?
Make sure your human doesn’t drown
My human said he’s not allowed there any more but it looks nice
Because daddy keeps the A/C so low because he sweats so much, I bet
My human needs to be more responsible I think. Hi Chance!
I want to eat your nose
If that’s real burberry that scarf is all mine not sorry
My human is always buyin beefs you guys would be BIG frens ps love the hat murphy
Good guys wear black HIGH CJ my human says you guys won the Quinana trade congratulations!
I want to snuggle up in those cargo shorts and sniff your balls if you don’t mind
SCOUT you are such a good boy I want to tackle you and put your whole throat in my mouth that would be so fun
I’m not jealous. Just sayin it would be nice to hit the bars with my human once and awhile and White Sox Dave’s apartment doesn’t count.
Anyways that’s it for this week in Chicago Dogs. Thanks for reading. Please send @BarstoolCarl all your pictures from the weekend so he can round us all up again next Friday! LOVE YOU GUYS