A Student Couldn't Afford A Christmas Gift For Her Teacher, So She Gave Her The Marshmallows From Her Lucky Charms
Not to get all mushy and #FeelGoodFriday on you guys, but this right here is what Christmas is all about. I bet Jesus was beaming ear-to-ear when he saw it on Facebook before the next 5 posts of political memes sent him back to internet hell. You can say that giving your teacher free cereal in a bag is some true poor person shit and that is probably true. But a kid giving someone else the marshmallows out of their Lucky Charms is pretty much the nicest thing a kid, or to be honest a human, is capable of doing for another. Real life gift of the Magi shit. If you willingly take the mallows out of your Lucky Charms and leave yourself with only oats and milk, you pretty much sentenced yourself to a breakfast of Alpha-Bits. And while I would never completely slander Alpha-Bits since they’ll do in an absolute pinch, there’s a reason why Lucky Charms is in the Cereal Hall of Fame and Alpha-Bits has to buy a ticket to get in there. Those glorious marshmallows. Again, it’s not a gift card to Amazon or a holiday popcorn tin. But a kid giving someone the marshmallows out of their Lucky Charms is pretty much equal to an adult giving you the shirt off their back. True heartwarming stuff to take us into the holiday weekend.
Bonus Holiday Popcorn Tin Flavor Rankings:
1. Caramel Corn: The stud of the tin by far. Tastes fresher than the other two corns thanks to the caramel coating and just flat out tastes better. There’s a reason Cracker Jack has been around for a million years and it’s not the peanuts or the shitty free prize. It’s because caramel corn is the tits.
2. Cheddar Popcorn: Closer to 3 than 1 in my opinion and if the cheddar is white, it loses two full letter grades. Give me the super fake, super neon orange cheddar popcorn over that basic ass white cheddar.
3. Butter Popcorn: Easily the worst of the three and only makes the tin because it’s a classic flavor. But if you got a batch of popcorn tin butter popcorn at the movie theater, you would be pissed, which is saying something considering how shitty some movie popcorn is.
For the record, I agree with the take that Kettle Corn would be a suitable 4th corn to add to the tin, even if it took some of the luster away from caramel corn as the only sweet corn of the tin. Kettle corn is fucking awesome.