Tom Brady Just Pretended To Retire While Flexing All Over Us Poors

I’ve seen a lot of “flexes,” as the kids say, in my day. From the “Money Ain’t a Thang” video, to the entire Entourage series, to Jeff Bezos saying he doesn’t know what to do with all his money so he’s gonna do space stuff, I’ve seen it all. But I’m not sure I’ve ever seen anything like Tom Brady getting into a TB12 edition Aston Martin while Drake says “Trust me at the top it isn’t lonely.” I’ve legitimately never felt like a more insignificant man than I did while watching that.

But, bad joke from Tom. Didn’t even fool me for a second because I know he’s never retiring.

PS – Speaking of 1,000 rushing yards, these shirts are RIDICULOUS. So ridiculous that I must have one.