Prepare To Fall In Love With "Murder Leg", The Eagles Undrafted Free Agent Kicker

AnchorOfGold - Position: Kicker, though Spear may believe he’s actually a linebacker.

Size: 5’10”, 195 lbs.

Recruit Ranking: A two-star recruit at kicker.

2013 Statistics: 15/19 field goals, two field goals from 50+ yards, long of 54 yards, 99 points scored, three tackles.

Introducing one of the newest Philadelphia Eagles, undrafted free agent kicker Carey Spear out of Vanderbuilt. On the surface it’s a very by the books, meh signing by the Birds. The guy may not even be good enough to challenge Alex Henery for his job, which is embarrassing because a Oscar Pistorius without his prostectics could kick a better ball then that stick figure. So why do we care about this kid?

Two reasons: His nickname is Murder Leg. And 2) Murder Leg brings the wood. TRUCK STICK:

Eat Thigh, Cordarrelle Patterson (4th GIF).

It’s a shame we took David Akers for granted all those years. With Alex Henery being so inconsistant combined with his lack of overall manhood leg strength (seriously, I’ve never seen an NFL kicker fail to reach the endzone EVERY SINGLE TIME on kickoffs), we’ll need a new foot. Sure, I’d love to have the next coming of Justin Tucker or Adam Viniteri walk through that door, but why not give Murder Leg a shot? Expectations aren’t high because, you know, Chip Kelly doesn’t take kickers in the 4th round like Andy Reid did with pencil dick. We literally have nothing to lose except for football games.

It won’t matter if his leg isn’t strong enough (Spoiler alert: It isn’t) to force touchbacks on a regular basis. With “Murder Leg” using his body as a missile and Bryan Braman laying pipe without a helmet, there’s no way anyone is going to take it past the 20 vs. this kickoff team.

PS – Noodleleg vs Murder Leg! LOLZ! In reality, expect neither to be on the roster this time next year.