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Meanwhile In The CFL We Have Offensive Linemen Celebrating Touchdowns By Chugging Full Cans Of Beer

You hear those footsteps Roger? That’s the CFL sneaking up on you one offensive-lineman-touchdown-followed-by-beer-chugging celebration at a time. If someone in the NFL tried to do this, they would get blackballed from the league immediately. Banned for life. It wouldn’t matter if they drank whatever the official beer of the NFL was at that moment. You would see Colin Kaepernick get an NFL roster spot before the player that had the nerve to drink a beer after a touchdown got his next NFL paycheck.

But our brothers north of the border are slugging extra strong Canadian beer tall boys and smashing it on their helmets after touchdowns before their team’s official Twitter is tweeting it out because football is supposed to be fun. I fucking love it. The fact this O-lineman had this celebration planned out in case he hit paydirt is better than anything the Raiders did last night. I’m shocked we never saw this happen in the XFL. Unless we did and I just forgot because the only thing I remember from that league is He Hate Me and the coin flip being replaced by a race to a football that gave at least one of the participants instant CTE every single time.

God I miss the old XFL and lowkey love the CFL. Sorry limbo guys, you have officially been bumped out of the number 1 spot for CFL celebrations.

On a related note, the Ottawa Redblacks are officially my favorite CFL team* solely because they were responsible for both of these celebrations.

*If Redblacks means something problematic, I take back my favorite team allegiance because I don’t want a hit piece written about me being a hateful bigot due to my CFL fandom

UPDATE: Turns out that beer not only wasn’t extra strong but was also organic.

What started as a beautiful moment in football history has now become a black mark on the resumes of Canadians and offensive linemen worldwide.