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Johnny Depp Is Too Big Of A Pussy To Play Software Giant John McAfee Says John McAfee

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Goodness gracious. I have no idea what this is all about but John McAfee must use a shit ton of drugs. Afterall, Johnny Depp once played Hunter S Thompson who didnt shy away from drug use. Remember, according to ole Jean Carroll’s biography, Hunter S Thompson’s day looked something like this.

3:00 p.m. rise

3:05 Chivas Regal with the morning papers, Dunhills

3:45 cocaine

3:50 another glass of Chivas, Dunhill

4:05 first cup of coffee, Dunhill

4:15 cocaine

4:16 orange juice, Dunhill

4:30 cocaine

4:54 cocaine

5:05 cocaine

5:11 coffee, Dunhills

5:30 more ice in the Chivas

5:45 cocaine, etc., etc.

6:00 grass to take the edge off the day

7:05 Woody Creek Tavern for lunch-Heineken, two margaritas, coleslaw, a taco salad, a double order of fried onion rings, carrot cake, ice cream, a bean fritter, Dunhills, another Heineken, cocaine, and for the ride home, a snow cone (a glass of shredded ice over which is poured three or four jig­gers of Chivas)

9:00 starts snorting cocaine seriously

10:00 drops acid

11:00 Chartreuse, cocaine, grass

11:30 cocaine, etc, etc.

12:00 midnight, Hunter S. Thompson is ready to write

12:05-6:00 a.m. Chartreuse, cocaine, grass, Chivas, coffee, Heineken, clove cigarettes, grapefruit, Dunhills, orange juice, gin, continuous pornographic movies.

6:00 the hot tub-champagne, Dove Bars, fettuccine Alfredo

8:00 Halcyon

8:20 sleep

6am sounds so delightful. Champagne in the hot tub with ice cream and fettuccine alfredo. What a morning.

Now, I dont think Johnny Depp was actually doing Hunter S Thompson’s routine when he played him in the movie and maybe that is a requirement for John McAfee who is an absolute loon. Maybe the two characters are too close to each other in terms of successful crazies but either way, you cant fault Johnny Depp for not wanting to be involved. John McAfee is too crazy to be around unless you need to rip a piss in public from time to time.

“My fragile connection with the world of polite society has, without a doubt, been severed,” he wrote. “My attire would rank me among the worst-dressed Tijuana panhandlers. My hygiene is no better. Yesterday, for the first time, I urinated in public, in broad daylight.

Been there.

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Good move, Johnny. Dont wanna be typecasted into either a pirate or a crazy-successful lunatic.