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Of Course There's A Woman Out There Shoving Paint Filled Eggs Up Her Vag Then "Laying" Them In The Name Of Art

YouTube – An upright standing nude on a loft… One with ink and acrylic fueled egg… A preserved canvas…

What the spectators are about to expect, is the compressed birth of a piece of art.

Slowly the egg leaves the natal canal of the artist and smashes on the canvas, red colour flows out. The next egg contains another colour and so bit by bit, accompanied only by loud “Plops”, an abstract art work originates — archaically, uncontrollably and intuitively. At the end of this almost meditative art birth performance the stained canvas is folded up, smoothed and unfolded to a symmetrically reflected picture, astonishingly coloured and full of strong because universal symbolism.

The “PlopEgg Painting” itself releases a loose chain of thoughts — about the creation fear, the symbolic strength of the casual and the creative power of the femininity. A comparison to wild associations arises and by the intensity of the seen and experienced, one becomes clear: the art needs like so often the corporeity to be able to manifest itself.

Milo Moire’s performances start with daydreaming, with (every)daily, personal physical experiences which condense by wild associations to an internal whole piece of art about to mature and enter the world. The corporeity becomes the need for her artistic expression to make the happened – also for the spectator – experienceable. Milo Moire describes her art, as an „art led by intuition. To create art, I use THE original source of the femininity — my vagina”.

Milo Moire opens her performance cycle “The PlopEgg Painting Performance # 1 – A Birth of a Picture” on the famous art fair Art Cologne — a place at which the art gets involved in the flirtation with big figures. The hashtag 1 stands for the first Art-Birth-Picture. Other performances should follow worldwide.

Within the context of art (performance), commerce (art fair) and opinion creation (media) a deliberate-accidental creation act happens, which instantly provokes ambivalent interpretations. „In my art i try to create mental doors”, the artist says. And there is always at least one door left to pass through a mirror.

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(Typical broad. Takes 20 minutes to explain something when it could be done in 2 seconds. 4 words: Naked Egg Queef Art. Done and done)

And people say art is dead. Michelangelo. Da Vinci. Picasso. All are pale in comparison to this grown woman shoving paint filled eggs up her cooch and laying them out like some sort of Pterodactyl porn. She’s just expressing her artistic views of birth. Maybe if I go and start rubbing one out on the Art Museum steps and call myself an artist we’ll have another gig on our hands. Plenty of bums down there already giving away their birth-inspired art publicly for free.

Love how she’s covered for the insertion of the eggs. Because watching a woman squeeze them out of her fanny like a damn reptile laying eggs in the sand is naturally PG-13. Is there an uncensored version? I’m asking for myself.

UPDATE: Why yes, yes there is. Because if you’re going to get a virus that fries your harddrive it might as well be from illegally downloading some naked broad queefing eggs. Go big or go home.