Move Over McGregor-Khabib, This Rat Fight Is The Fight Of The Year

Now you’re in NEW YOOOOOOOORK!. KFC tried to tell us. Some days its homeless people beating the shit out of each other and some days the goddamn rats are going at it. After living here for almost 2 years now, I’ve become desensitized to almost anything. People wacking it in phone booths as you walk home, human beings shitting on the sidewalk, people you’ve seen in movies getting coffee in front of you, tourists walking around like a school of baitfish, delivery guys getting in bike crashes right in front of you, old people falling, and really any other combinations you can think of. Yesterday I saw a hot girl walking in heels on my way to work. Woah that girl is hot, I thought to myself. Next thing you know she stepped on a sidewalk crack the wrong way and ate shit hard. I’m talking mild high ankle sprain type of shit, maybe 4-6 weeks on the IR. Not a single soul stopped what they were doing. Much like a twig placed in front of a stream of ants following a pheromone trail back to their nest from a crushed Gusher you dropped in the dirt, people just walked around her as she got up gathered her things and tried to walk it off. Just a stunning display of disregard for another human. People here are basically the computer characters in Grand Theft Auto.

That being said, I can’t imagine seeing this go down. Some things transcend the limits of “weird New York shit” and Stuart Little vs. Ratatouille for the 8 oz. Champion of the World certainly qualifies. That’s something you can tell your grandkids about.

Here is a video of a New York Rat eating a Pigeon.

Here is a video of how a Rat can wriggle up your toilet!

A quick look at one of NYC’s most rat infested parks!

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But don’t fret! Come check out spacious and uncrowded Times Square or look at some tall buildings! Feel the magic!