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Dikembe Mutombo Outright Shackles The Denver Nuggets Mascot

Dikembe, you dog, you. Getting old, though. Dikembe in his prime would’ve swatted that lion(? – looks more of an autistic rodent) right in the face then walk into the nearest Georgetown bar yelling simply, “WHO WANTS TO SEX MUTOMBO?!?!”. Promptly swagger out with pretty white girls under each arm. For shame. Plus the mascot has to be pissed because that was a great jump wasted. Shit’s harder than it looks. If it weren’t I’d be traveling basking in the moderate fame and fortune of heading up the Sixers Dunk Team. Twas not meant to be.

The only Geico commercial in history that doesn’t bring instant thoughts of suicide into one’s head.