Machine Gun Kelly's Diss Track Against Eminem Might Be Just What The Doctor Ordered
Machine Gun Kelly released a diss track against Eminem. Chaps blogged it over the weekend but I wanted to deep-dive. It very much follows the example of Drake’s “Back-to-Back” diss track against Meek Mill, a song that will lead you to front squat PRs. Both employ a simple, grimy beat that doesn’t overwhelm the piercing lyrics. Pretty catchy, honestly.
I have no problem with the song. In fact, I think it’s good. I’ve listened to it a few times. I wasn’t familiar with Machine Gun Kelly’s work prior to this, and maybe that’s on me. I know he’s made a few pop-rap songs like this one:
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I’m not a fan of slow rap songs that feature pop artists, and that goes for Eminem too. I hated “Love the way you lie” (Rihanna) and “River” (Ed Sheeran) and all the other songs he’s done since 2010 with Pink, Skylar Grey, etc. But I get that they have massive commercial appeal.
My issue is more with the presentation of the song. MGK makes it very clear in his “diss” that he’s a huge fan of Eminem:
Homie we get it, we know that you’re the greatest rapper alive
Fucking dweeb, all you do is read the dictionary and stay inside.
Yeah I’ll acknowledge you’re the GOAT
But I’m The Gunner, bitch, I got you in the scope.
And…
Poppin’… Veuve? Sweet dude. I remember the first time I wasted a $47.99 bottle of champagne. Needed a bottle to pee in so I dumped that shit on the ground. Probably could have just peed on the ground but I like to save my urine in case I need to sterilize a wound. Sure as hell didn’t do it in a public bathroom with my shirt off though. What the hell is happening here? I can only imagine that one of Machine Gun’s (lol) cronies pulled him off the stage while he was telling a fresh batch of high schoolers about the perils of tattoo addiction. Dude, your torso is TOO LONG. Covering that shit brick by brick, I guess?
If you’re going to make a diss track about someone, don’t make a video about how happy their diss track made you. Dude is giddy about being insulted by his idol. His response is a bipolar treatise that waffles between adulation and aggression. Hard to buy the cynicism when you know he’d shit himself for a selfie with Eminem.
Anyway, the 2000s in me wants (expects) Eminem to come back at this with one of the most hardcore diss tracks of all time. But I just don’t know anymore. His new album is really solid, and the closest thing we’ve seen to his old form. But he’s also kind of a grown up now, and seems to have mastered his emotions? You know, those same emotions that used to have him rapping about chopping his wife up and putting her in the bathtub and beating her with the pieces of her body that he’d sawed off? Here’s hoping the sparks fly. Who knew that MACHINE GUN KELLY might be the guy to bring Slim Shady back from his sabbatical.
Now tell me, what do you stand for? (What?)
I know you can’t stand yourself (no)
Trying to be the old you so bad you Stan yourself (ha)
Good.