I Just Can't Believe People Are Walking Around New York City Drinking Hot Coffee Today

I don’t know if I’ve ever mentioned it, but I walk to work these days. I recently moved from Hoboken to New York City, about a 10, sometimes 11 minute walk from the office. It’s wonderful. My old commute was walk->ferry->shuttle->walk. My new commute is simply walk. And that’s it. Could not recommend living in walking distance of where you work more. Sure I pay an arm and a leg for my apartment, but them’s the breaks. And sure eventually I’d like to have a yard and a dog and be happy, but that’s in the future. For now though, I’m content.

But when things start to suck are on days like today. For those who don’t live in this Hell Hole known as New York City, here’s what we’re working with today:

Heat index of 93 at 9:15 this morning. Yesterday afternoon it was 103. When I checked my weather app at midnight last night, it was 95. You could slice the air with a butter knife. I’ve been less wet after getting out of a swimming pool than I was after walking home last night.

And apparently today is even hotter. It’s currently 11:50am and 91 degrees outside with a heat index of 100, and it’s not even close to peaking yet. Pretty sure it’s going to be 115 by 3pm. Dogs are going to be chasing cats, and both are gonna be walking!

Sorry, I’m addicted to Jay Leno jokes right now, but I digress. The reason I’m talkin’ weather is for one reason, and one reason only: on my way to work this morning, while it was 95 degrees outside, there were people walking around drinking HOT coffee. Not iced coffee, not a refreshing iced tea, not bottled water, but hot coffee. I couldn’t believe it. I’m not one to tell people what to do, but if you drink hot coffee on 100 degree days while physically walking outside, you are an *KFC voice* IDIOT. I’m sweating just thinking about it. I wanted to run up to people and spike their coffee cup on the ground Gronk style to stop them from taking another sip and dying.

I get people just enjoy a hot coffee. People have routines. But enough is enough. I mean the streets are physically melting. Grow a brain. Have some self respect. Do literally anything else. People who are guzzling down piping hot beverages outside in New York City today,

Furthermore, while we’re here, weather is crazy.

Pretty sure Denver is the ideal place to live if you don’t have Asthma.