Monday Homestretch
Tesla probably the biggest news today in a week that should be a yawner. Earnings have slowed to a grinding halt, and most people are trying to squeeze in some days off before the kids go back to school.
TSLA down just under 3 percent after Chief Executive Elon Musk abandoned his plan to take the electric carmaker private. Notes from Wall Street analysts questioned Musk’s credibility going forward in the face of a possible investigation by the SEC into the factual accuracy of an 8/7 tweet that funding for the buyout deal was “secured”.
I think a fair amount of problems on Wall Street and beyond can be resolved if we convince Twitter that politicians and CEOs should not have access to their platform.
Twitter unfairly suspended me once for commenting on this GIF of Britney licking Snoop’s sweaty beard…
They should take the keys away from Trump and Musk just as easily.
Finance Calendar for the rest of the week…
Tuesday — Large co-hosting Barstool Breakfast… Best Buy, H&R Block, and Tiffany earnings; US home prices for June
Wednesday — Salesforce and Brown-Forman earnings; US 2Q GDP (second revision); Pending Home Sales
Thursday — Large co-hosting Barstool Breakfast…Abercrombie and Fitch, Campbell Soup, Lululemon, and Dollar Tree earnings; Weekly Jobless Claims
Friday — Large co-hosting Barstool Breakfast…Eurozone unemployment for July; Chicago PMI; Consumer Sentiment Index
Moving on… To placate the recent influx of Korean readers, I will post an English tutorial as often as I can find one where an adorable young lady pronounces “coke” like “cock.”
This is obviously trying to teach Koreans how to buy cocaine, right?… “Please give me cigarette.”, “Please give me coke.”, “Do you have coke?”, and “How much is this?” are not traditional English expressions used when ordering a soft drink. It’s something you say to a shady bouncer at 3AM. I was just waiting for the next slide to say, “I will blow you for 8 ball.”
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Googled the word “cokehead image,” and this popped up…
Finally… I HATE NY
I was up in the SIRIUS studios for a live interview last week, and then had to walk down to Port Authority afterwards to get my car. In a momentary lapse of reason, I walked through the heart of Times Square in 90 degree weather.
Obviously, as an old New Yorker, I have been walking through Times Square since probably the mid-80s. Back then it was something to behold. There was a Supreme Court ruling in the 1960s that declared pornography was a form of free speech, which caused a ripple effect that changed the burlesque theatre of old Times Square into the Live Sex and Peep Shows of the 70s-90s. In 1998, Rudy Giuliani successfully fought to remove porn from the area in his attempt to clean up New York.
During the ensuing rebrand and rebuild of Times Square, tradesmen from all over the globe armed with industrial scrapers descended on midtown to abrade 30 years worth of dried semen from the floors of buildings to make way for new retail spaces and touristy restaurants. For the nostalgia lover, on especially muggy days you can still detect the faint odor of old cum near the “peanut friendly section” of the M&M Store.
As a result, Times Square is 100% different from the Times Square of my youth, but still 100% terrible. Just throngs of sweaty tourists mulling about with selfie sticks while entrepreneurial New York scam-artists try to rob them. At least in the 80s you would be scammed out of $5 but got to see some tits. Now you’ll get fleeced for $20 to take a picture with some pedophile in a damp Sesame Street Elmo furry costume that smells like a cadaver’s taint.
I fucking HATE NY.
Take a report.
-Large