HOONHERO
Shanghaiist- “Earlier this week, a Chinese uncle jumped into Wuhan’s Han River and saved a woman from drowning, all while managing to keep his cigarette lit. After the rescuing the woman, he can be seen standing in the water, chatting and having a smoke.”
This guy is 100% a member of the Guardians of the Golden Leaves.
If that organization doesn’t ring a bell, they’re are pretty much the Avengers of Hoon Crankers that Francis and I learned about at the Shanghai Tobacco Museum.
But honestly, there really isn’t anything the Chinese can’t do without a cigarette in their mouths. For some it’s almost an extension of their body. They can flawlessly serve food
ride bikes
get married
and walk the dog
all while cranking the finest hoons this side of the Yangtze river. Some historians believe that If the Chinese had already discovered tobacco at the time, the Great Wall could have been built in half the time.
However, the Vape craze has finally found it’s way to the Middle Kingdom, and with it, dangerous repercussions. Introducing….
VAPEVILLIANS
A senior official from the Civil Aviation Administration of China (CAAC) told reporters Friday that, without notifying the pilot, the unnamed co-pilot was trying to turn off air recycling fans to prevent the vapor from spreading into the passenger cabin.
Instead, he toggled the wrong switches, which were close to his intended target, leading to a drop in oxygen levels that triggered altitude warnings.
Qiao Yibin, the CAAC official, promised to hand down “severe punishment in accordance with laws and regulations,” if the regulator’s final conclusion on the incident matches its initial finding.
It’s still unclear what health risks are associated with Vaping, but it seems to have at least been established that they are healthier than cranking old fashioned fire sticks. I’ve even found myself recently putting down the hoons and picking up a
#MyBlu from time to time. However, in a place like China, you need to take in the external cost of disrupting the natural order of things. Over the past 100 years, the Chinese have harmoniously evolved into the ultimate hoon cranking machines. Cigarettes have woven themselves into the fabric of their daily lives. When you throw new technology in the mix, there is going to be complications. The aviation accident mentioned in the article above is the Vaping equivalent of your grandparent trying to FaceTime you for the first time, but with potentially fatal repercussions. If China knows what’s safe for it’s citizens they should make cock-pit cranking legal again. I’m sure the pilots weren’t terrible people, just simple nicotine addicts trying to grapple with new technology. In inexperienced hands, anyone with an e-cigarette is always one puff away from becoming a #VapeVillian, and that’s a scary world to live in.
ride bikes
get married
and walk the dog