Pretty Girl Told Cops She Can't Be Arrested Because She Is A "very clean, thoroughbred, white girl"

Well hello there! I don’t even care what she did to wind up in an orange jump suit, I just know it’ll be a good story to tell our children. But while we are here, might as well tell the story. Actually, might as well tell the cops side of the story. I will hold any judgement until she tells me her side, probably on our 3rd or 4th date.

NY Post - A boozed-up South Carolina woman pulled over for blowing past a stop sign at 60 mph told cops she shouldn’t be arrested because she’s a “very clean, thoroughbred, white girl,” according to a police report.

But Lauren Elizabeth Cutshaw’s lecture didn’t convince officers from the Bluffton Police Department — who arrested her on charges of speeding, disregarding a stop sign, simple possession of marijuana, driving under the influence and possession of drug paraphernalia, a police spokesman confirmed to The Post.

Let’s hold it here. Ok so here are the alleged facts- she ran a stop sign, drunk, and had weed in the car. Sounds bad on paper, can’t deny that. But in her defense….

After getting pulled over at about 1:45 a.m. Saturday near Bluffton and May River roads, where she was spotted speeding through a four-way stop sign, Cutshaw told cops she had had just two glasses of wine, according to the police report obtained by the Island Packet.

“I mean I was celebrating my birthday,” Cutshaw, who turns 33 on Thursday, told the cops when they asked her how big the glasses were for her alleged two drinks, according to the report.

It was her birthday! Can’t very well arrest a gal on her birthday, can ya? The cops seemed to disagree, so she continued….

But she didn’t stop there. Cutshaw gave the officers a litany of other reasons why she deserved to be let off the hook: She maintained perfect grades during all of her school years, was a cheerleader and a member of a sorority. Her partner is also a cop, Cutshaw said.

“I’m a white, clean girl,” Cutshaw said, according to the report.

Perfect grades! Cheerleader! Sorority girl! You know, all things cops care about when it comes to arresting drunk drivers. “Oh, you were in Kappa Kappa? Why didn’t you say that to begin with you silly rascal?! On you go. Oh wait, shotgun this beer first. It is your birthday after all!” Unfortunately for Lauren Elizabeth though, being a clean white girl didn’t earn her a get out of jail free card.

The officer also noted that Cutshaw, who had a blood alcohol level of 0.18, failed sobriety tests and had bloodshot eyes. She was also slurring her words, according to the report.

Cutshaw was later booked into the Beaufort County Detention Center.

Darn. One good thing did come out of this though. This blog, kids, is how I met your mother.