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Nobody Panic, But Aaron Judge Has a Chip Fracture On His Right Wrist And Will Be Out At Least Three Weeks

Don’t do this.

Do this.

Well, that sucked donkey dick. Last night should be a gleeful night as we celebrate a win over the Royals, Sonny Gray’s third good start in a row, and a Red Sox loss to the Minnesota Twins. Instead? Instead, we find out we’re without Aaron Judge for at least three weeks, and I would guess more than that to make sure he’s good to go. How did this happen?

Jakob Junis, who spells his name like an asshole, lost control of a fastball and it ran inside on Judge’s wrist. He clearly was upset as he walked to first, but stayed in the game after getting briefly checked out. He came around to score, but because he was the DH no one knew if he was coming out of the game or not until his next at bat. I was sitting down the third base line and because of my incredible vision I could see him talking to head trainer Steve Donahue and then going down the tunnel for what I assumed were x-rays. He later emerged and grabbed a bat to go on-deck which made it seem like everything was okay. During his at bat he nubbed a ball to first and reached on an infield single. I kind of noticed through replay he had an awkward reaction to the contact with the ball. Of course, Judge left the game after that half inning and headed to New York Presbyterian Hospital for further tests. Nightmare fuel.

When Miggy Andujar came up to pinch hit that’s when Yankees Twitter went into full panic mode. With no update coming from the Yankees team, everyone started guessing a million things. Neil Walker came to bat later in the game and some bizarre lights started to appear from the stands. Because my mind was on Judge the whole time, with the game in hand, I instantly thought this was some kind of candle light vigil for Judge to be okay because I’m a crazy person.

Honestly, I don’t care what the real meaning of it was, but to me it was a candle light vigil and it worked because at least Judge isn’t out for the year. Yes, this is AWFUL timing with the Yankees needing every game they can get to catch the Sox. They go to Fenway next week for a massive four game series. They need number 99 in uniform for those games, but he won’t be there. Instead it’s going to be an outfield of Gardner, Hicks, and Stanton for the time being unless Clint Frazier becomes healthy suddenly. This is also bad time for Gary Sanchez to be dealing with his groin injury again because he easily could be slotted in as the main DH. Instead the Yankees will go the entire month of August without both Gary Sanchez and Aaron Judge. Luckily the schedule isn’t too daunting besides the Sox in that month: 3 more against KC, 2 vs. Balt, 3 @CWS, 4 vs. Tex, 1 vs. NYM, 3 vs. TB, 3 vs. TOR, 2 @Mia, 4 @Balt, 3 vs. CWS, 4 vs. Det. All those teams suck besides Tampa.

Listen it’s not going to be easy, but it’s do-able. It’s time for Giancarlo Stanton to put this team on his motherfucking back. I know he’s been hitting great lately, but I need Stanton to turn into a goddamn cyborg. I need Gleyber to be Gleyber and for him to become the new #2 hitter. Gardner needs to produce. Bird needs to continue what he’s been doing. It’s next man up. What sucks with trading McKinney today is that he definitely would have been the move tomorrow for a 4th outfielder/DH. Now I guess we’re keeping Shane Robinson because Clint is still out. The move tomorrow will be interesting and whoever hits second will be interesting. My money is on Gleyber.

This could have been so much worse, and I thank our candle light vigil members for that. We are legit crazy people for doing it, but I love every goddamn one of you that shined your phones in the sky last night. The season is still alive because of us.

If you want to see my live reaction to the Judge news and the thoughts of a crazy person then watch the short periscope I did.

P.S. KFC is the devil