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Wednesday Homestretch

Today is probably the busiest day for earnings thus far.  Too much to process for a guy who doesn’t need to pay attention anymore, so I won’t even try.  Consensus on desks has been that volumes are picking up these past few days, so that is a positive for guys in my old seat. Good luck, fellas.

Speaking of guys in an old seat…

demi helms

Nice to see Demi Moore stepping up to a guy closer in age, and that is actually likable.

Demi is now 55 to Helms’ 44, and it seems that between Vin Diesel, Tom Cruise, and now Demi, I find an actor in their fifties doing something newsworthy almost every day.  Gives me hope that I may finally find some relevancy in the years to come.  Plus, I am much more comfy talking about whatever young buck Demi Moore is banging, than whatever amount of heroin Demi Lovato might be banging… Thoughts and prayers, DL.

I like to remember Demi Moore like this…

But I am sure her undercarriage now resembles something you would see pre-packaged at the deli counter.- “Tony!… Gimme a half pound of Boars Head ham sliced so thin it only has one side.”

The article I shared above seems to have been removed from the website that first posted it, so take this “fake news” with a grain of salt, but still enjoy the possibility of Andy Bernard banging the broad from A Few Good Men.

What else?

Trump seems to be in the headlines still for all the wrong reasons.  I really am not surprised that a billionaire was banging Playmates, and I am not overly concerned whether or not campaign money was used to cover it up, because campaign funds have historically been deep down in places you don’t like to talk about at parties, but you want them on that wall.  You NEED them on that wall (second A Few Good Men reference).  All I am taking away from these new findings is that I will never again talk to a lawyer that uses a tape recorder.

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And finally… Boxing.

The young gentleman here who covers all things MMA, Robbie Fox, sent me a twitter link to famous boxing knockouts, and it is fantastic.  I might post one regularly because, even if you’re in a crowded mens room, knockouts are equally enjoyable either with or without the sound on.

And if you’re the type of cat who doesn’t mind the sound of 2 grown men fighting and Howard Cosell emanating from your stall, well, then God bless you.

I was a Hagler guy growing up, but if you wanna see a young finisher, watch Sugar Ray Leonard as he closes in on (and then knocks the fuck out of) Andy Price in the first round… September 1979.

And if you don’t enjoy a minute and a half of 2 guys going at it in the ring, then maybe go find a site where you can watch a minute and a half of 2 guys going at it in bed.

The win brought Leonard’s record up to 25-0, and was a tune-up fight before Sugar fought Wilfred Benitez two months later for his first welterweight belt.

I am going to stay with boxing, because this thing that is going on with Rough N Rowdy 4 intrigues the shit out of me.

On this latest card, the promotion crew has set up a fight between our resident homosexual, Gay Pat, and a slack jawed homophobe.  It is being touted as “Pride vs Prejudice”, which I think is brilliant, and even though I have never been called “a champion of gay rights” per se, you can best believe I will be either in the audience or at home jerking off 2 Shake Weights wearing a t-shirt that says “Pullin’ for Pat”.

On top of that fight, we got news today that the police officer who is scheduled to fight some local skate-punk has since been let go of his duties as a cop for recording a promo video with a crew from Barstool that the department felt was inappropriate.  The department signed off on everything that was filmed, and the footage itself was obviously done in a joking promotional manner, but the man was fired nonetheless.  I have been fired for a lot less, so I am not overly surprised at the termination, but thoughts and prayers go out either way.

The officer has decided to still go through with the fight, and my boss has pledged to pay him 2 times his (the officer’s) annual salary win-or-lose, which by no means makes up for the loss of a job, but it’s exponentially more than Don King would’ve done.

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So when I tune into RNR4 next Sunday, I am not expecting to see Ray Leonard-like results, but it’s still going to be electric. And if I don’t make it to Youngstown to watch it live, then party at Casa de Large, and you’re all invited… BYOSW (Shake Weight).

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To order the fight click here.  It’s $15.99 and jumps to 20 bucks the day of the fight. As a reminder, legendary comedian Bill Burr, legendary blogger Big Cat and legendary Large’s boss Dave Portnoy will be announcing. Legendary NFL punter turned radio personality Pat McAfee will be doing ring intros, and legendary policeman career ruining Rone and Caleb will be doing the fighter interviews.

Take a report.

-Large