Grading the Newest Sex Scandal Teacher

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Reader email:  Jerry, not sure what to do with this. Went to college with this girl and she was very churchy/holier than thou. Her husband is a pastor and they have 4 kids. Yikes.

North DakotaA former middle school teacher is facing three felony charges after allegedly sharing hundreds of sexually explicit Snapchat videos and photos with two male students and having sex with one along a gravel road.

Shannon Moser, 37, of Moorhead, was charged in Cass County District Court with two counts of using a minor in a sexual performance, Class A felonies, and one count of sexual assault, a Class C felony. Moser was a science teacher at Liberty Middle School since fall 2016 and resigned July 12. …

Moser’s attorney, Scott Brand, said  … Moser has had no other criminal activity and has been engaged in her community as a volunteer.

“She’s mentored younger women and mothers who went through a tough upbringing,” he said. “She has been an instrumental person in people’s lives in a positive way.” …

West Fargo police received an anonymous tip in June that Moser was having sex with a male student in Rendezvous Park in West Fargo and giving him electronic tobacco products.

More anonymous complaints came in alleging that Moser had shared nude Snapchat photos with a 16-year-old West Fargo student.

Police interviewed the student on July 3, and the student denied an inappropriate relationship with Moser. But police interviewed the student’s friend who claimed the student had talked about having sex with Moser in the park.

Police re-interviewed the student, who had told his mother that he had sex with Moser. The student told police he had known Moser personally for about two years, as she was considered a family friend. They had added each other on Snapchat in May or early June, and she began sending him sexually explicit photos and messages.

After about three days, the student said Moser asked to meet, and the two met at Rendezvous Park sometime in early June during the evening. The boy got in her van, and they drove west of West Fargo, where she pulled over on a gravel road and the two had sex.

At that time, Moser told the student, “no one can know,” according to the report.

The student said Moser shared more photos following the encounter and asked at least once more if he wanted to have sex, but he declined.

Life as a prospective Sex Scandal Teacher in a place like West Fargo, North Dakota can’t be an easy one. I’ll admit I’ve never watched the TV show Fargo so all I know is everyone loves it, half of Hollywood is in it, and Ewan McGregor broke up his Obi Wan Kefamily to bang his co-star Mary Elizabeth Winstead. But I have seen the movie. So I’ll always assume the entire region is a bleak, Chekovian wasteland of straight, empty roads cutting through flat, frozen plains sparsely populated by simple, rural folk. Hardly a target rich environment for a saucy minister’s wife hangry for her science students.

So, credit where it’s due. Shannon Moser took the initiative. Bribed the kids with the latest SST commodity, e-cigs, set up the rendezvous – at Rendezvous Park no less, clever girl – and got busy producing hundreds naked Snapchats with two 16-year-olds and banged one by the old gravel road. That is how you go about not letting your circumstances get in the way of your SST aspirations.

The Grades:
Looks: Eesh. I don’t know the talent pool in West Fargo, but I know the Jerry Glasses Theorem which states all women look hotter with glasses than without disproven when I see it.
Grade: C-

Moral Compass/Bad Judgment: A veritable factory farm of naked Snapchats. Two kids. Rendezvous Park. Van sex. Gravel road sex. From a religious woman right under her minister husband’s nose. I would love to have been in the room when she was giving life advice to these “younger women and mothers who went through a tough upbringing.”
Grade: A

Intangibles: The Irish Rose was in The Music Man before, so I could go on all day about how “We’ve got trouble, my friends. Right here in River City. With a capital ‘T’ and that rhymes with ‘P’ and that stands for ‘poon.'” But I know like 10 percent of you would get the reference and I’d just be talking to myself. So instead I’ll just say “Moorhead.”
Grade: A

Overall: B-. The Looks grade can be a real killer.

Do you have someone you want to see graded? Tweet her to me @jerrythornton1 or email me at jerry@barstoolsports.com. Your service to the betterment of mankind will be its own reward.