This Whole Erik Karlsson Situation Is Really Starting To Chap My Ass
I’m just gonna go ahead and say it. What the fucking heck, guys? I’m getting real sick and tired of this nonsense. The next day some asshole “journalist” has a source who says that a deal for Erik Karlsson is finalized and just awaiting an official trade call to the league. The next thing you know we go 48 hours of dead silence answers. Then you’ve got some other jackass journo who strokes his meat to the fact that he’s in the PHWA saying that he has a source saying the deal will be complete as soon as all the details with a 3rd team are agreed to. The next thing you know we go 48 hours of dead silence and no answers. And then this afternoon, we get this.
All these bastards just keep calling their shots and all of them are coming out looking like Swaggy P.
Sources this. Sources that. Sources hit me with a wiffle ball bat. All these jabronis have their “sources close to the situation” and none of them know jack shit. But what’s chapping my ass isn’t the fact that none of these insiders actually know when Erik Karlsson is going to get traded and to whom. It’s not even the fact that Ottawa is taking this long to trade him. I can’t blame the Sens for trying to milk every last asset they can get for trading away the face of their franchise.
What is grinding my gears is the fact that they say a trade is coming and then just basically log out of their account for the next two days while everybody just sits around and waits for a trade with their thumb up their ass. I’ve been goddamn terrified to leave my phone for the past week or so. Legitimately scared to death because I feel like the second I put my phone away, that’s when the notification is going to come across that a trade has been completed. I’d rather be dead than have the trade go down and not immediately be able to overreact to it on the line. And it’s all these assholes’ fault. All these dickheads who regularly shit on bloggers for being wrong with their sources. And these guys are all shooting a collective 0% so far.
Meanwhile, a highly respected and reputable member of the media such as myself would never stoop to those levels just to get a few clicks and generate a little buzz. I’m not out here making shit up just for the sake of making shit up. My sources are actually plugged in.
So now I have a beer league box lacrosse game tonight from like 7-8:30. If there were ever a time for an actual Erik Karlsson trade to be finalized, I’d imagine that would be the time. But if anybody is going to break the news that Erik Karlsson has been traded while I’m away from my phone, it better be that muppet Whitney.