Soccer Players Freak Out And Hit The Deck When...........The Field Is Attacked By A Bees?

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I’m not gonna lie, I just figured the worst was happening at that soccer game when I saw the pictures. Usually never a good thing when people are a sporting event are HITTING THE DECK. I just assumed there was a masked mad man with an AR-15 running amok and being an all-around evil person. So I got a nice rush of relief when I realized it was bees. Obviously less scary than a guy with an AR-15………but just barely less scary. Bees don’t fuck around.

One time in high school we were trying to find a place to smoke (yeah we did drugs, what of it). Despite what you think about Iowa, I’m from the suburban part so it was sometimes hard to find places to smoke unless we wanted to drive 30 minutes into the middle of nowhere. We had two cars of people. Me and a few of us in my buddy’s jeep in the first car and then a Honda Accord full of people following us. We decided to drive back into these woods far enough where no one could see us.

As we were driving back, the jeep drove over a GIANT bee’s nest but nobody noticed. Then the Honda Accord followed and drove RIGHT THROUGH the pissed off bee’s nest. It instantly turned into that Tommy Boy scene except they weren’t joking. Everybody in the Accord bailed and sprinted in different directions. Everybody in the Accord got stung at least 15-20 times. The people in the jeep (myself included) didn’t get touched. We finally tracked everybody down who had bolted and started going over their bee stings. All over their arms and legs and hands. Everywhere. Then my buddy pulled down his pants and a bee had got him right on the tip of his dick. Incredible aim. We still smoked and the people with the bee stings said it was the worst decision ever. Good times.