America Needs More Secret Tunnels

When is the last time you stopped to think about how many secret tunnels America has? I think about it nearly every day. I can't help it. I love America and I love tunnels, secret ones, some may even call them lairs. Not liars, that's my friend Cons who didn't sing Anchors Aweigh after losing a bet but we have moved past that. New beginnings. 

China is trying to usurp the secret tunnel (lair) throne from the United States, and I can't get over it. 

China not only has secret tunnels, they have secret tunnels that open into the ocean and fits submarines! What do we do with our submarines? Just leave them docked somewhere that isn't a secret tunnel like a bunch of jabronis? Fugghetaboutit. We need to regain tunnel supremacy. I didn't forget to duck under a window in Iraq to see America be out-tunneled by our adversaries. I don't like to get political but sometimes I just can't help it. The first presidential candidate that promises me a tunnel in every lot and two cars in every tunnel will get my vote. 

On this episode we also had on a CIA agent who definitely didn't work in China *wink*, and a businessman who had some of his Intellectual Property stolen by China, pretty brazenly, they literally just fucking copied something and exported it back to China. We all remember what IP is from the Call Her Daddy saga, it's important. You should listen to it.

Round 1: Boozed-up. A recent study proves which branch of service drinks the most… well… at least goes to the hospital the most for binge drinking. Round 1 will be a judgment-free zone where we can judge everyone. 

Round 2: Wanna get boozed-up, put your pocket book down and just dance the night way? Dont try that shit in Italy friends. The US has banned dancing like this is a 1937 Quaker Community. 

Round 3: Hurry up and wait took on new meaning in 2001 for one anti-Taliban fighter. Hurry up and wait for round 3 so we can tell you just how long he had to wait in order for his relief to show up so he could depart the scene of his downed tank. Actual tank this time too. 

Round 4: Time for a little spy goofin with a former CIA agent and a businessman who experienced the Chinese intellectual theft practices first hand. 

Round 5: WHO DOES NUMBER 2 WORK FOR? A secret underwater cave was discovered by some folks doing some satellite goofin in the south china sea. I love a good secret lair.