With all sports temporarily (maybe) abolished, millions of people are wondering how they'll endure the dark days ahead. What will they talk about? What will they bet on? We can, after all, only talk about Tom Brady's drift into irrelevancy for so long. Unless you're Steven Cheah. But for those of you who are looking for someone to fill the content void in your life, I have one question: Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior Podcast Jesus?
I'm talking about Kirk Minihane, a man who might as well have been designed in a laboratory (not the same lab as the coronavirus though) to create captivating podcasts in the present sportless era. No MLB or NBA? That's fine. Pro sports wasn't part of his plan to deliver 120-180 minutes of addicting content every damn weekday. Now, I understand that the fearsome reputation of Kirk's fans -- The Minifans -- may have you reluctant to join our world. You may be asking yourself: Who is Drunk Era Curtis? What kind of person tweets GIFs of Dave Portnoy's dead dog? Why is that guy singing about alleged sex offenders in the Red Sox club house? Why are they calling people and having them fake orgasms? What happened in Madawaska? Why did Kirk predict in October that Portnoy was going to shed his mortal coil on May 22?
These are all important questions. And since we're looking at a 12-18 month stretch (depending on who you ask) of unprecedented crisis in American life, I'm happy to tell you that Podcast Jesus is always accepting converts, and there has never been a better time to join this cult.
Your first step should be to listen to the Year in Review show produced by that rank pervert Drunk Era Curtis, or DEC as we call him. DEC is a middle-aged family man who happens to host the Minifan Show, a podcast dedicated entirely to talking about Kirk Minihane and the Kirk Minihane Show. That multiple act, multiple part show does a pretty great job of bringing you up to speed on everything that happened from spring of last year, when Kirk escaped corporate hell to join Barstool Sports, until the start of the new roaring twenties. You can also check out some of the other fan content on Kirk's Youtube page. Presently, we're showing the following weekly shows: Mike and The Minifans, The Robinson Report, Mincel Intel*, The OG Minifans, and the Miniladies.
What inspires this kind of fanaticism? You'll have to discover the answer yourself. Get on board the Kirk Train and you'll never look back. We plan to podcast all the way to the apocalypse, so come along for the ride.
* Future episodes of Mincel Intel may be delayed pending the investigation into whether the hosts clandestinely purchased fraudulent Youtube views from Eastern European criminal organizations; DEC is leading the investigation.