Man Caves Are Under Attack By The Guy From VEEP!

Be vigilant out there folks, the guy who plays the Communications Director from Veep, and the jackbooted stormtrooper thugs in local law eforcement (not the ones I support with my thin blue line bumper sticker) are gearing up a secret operation to take down peoples man caves and confiscate all the memoribilia within. Its even more disappointing to see this attack on masculinity coming from someone who portrays such a high-level figure in our Constitutional Government, which is sworn to protect us from foreign enemies, and a broad.

Its a slippery slope that starts with letting your wife keep christmas wrapping paper on the shelf your “not using anyways” (aka saving it for when you win the ebay auction for the thigh-pads Kathy Ireland wore in Necessary Roughness), and then it progresses to having to put your weed wacker gasoline/oil blend into a regulation contaner because your old lady is “worried about the vapors.” Before you know it the full body padded dog-attack suit that you turned into a sex doll is sticking out of the trash can like a bunch of yard clippings that the missus’s good friend Gary took care of for you while you were laid up on your inflatable Hooters couch recovering from your march madness vasectomy surgery. Its disgusting

When are men going to stand up for ourselfs? The government wants to take away all your safe spaces to watch scrambeled cable porn and hand it over to a milleneal who would rather fuck an avocado then write-off the 200 square foot garage as a home office because you use the landline in it to call in sick to work the day after the Superbowl.

I swore a oath on my box of cuban cigars where I keep black and milds to protect your lifesize cleatus the FOX nfl robot replica you built out of sports illustrated swimsuit centerfolds stuck together with your own semen at all costs. And I plan on doing just that.

If Billy the Singing Seabasses are outlawed then only outlaws will have Billy the Singing Seabasses. Stay viglant.