Snacks Harrison Says He Has Playoff Experience Because He Makes The Playoffs Every Year In Madden

Clem1/06/2017 3:30 PM

I don’t care what the birth certificates or common sense say. Snacks Harrison and I are brothers. I have never felt such a connection to another man in my life. Dude loves crushing snacks and Madden seasons, which just happen to be about my two favorite things in life.

I am obviously 100000% behind what Snacks says here. Sure playing in the playoffs against the best players and teams the NFL has to offer is something you cannot simulate. But at the end of the day it’s just a game and a job. But Madden is different. The amount of virtual (and maybe real) blood, sweat, and tears that goes into any Madden season is second to none. The nerves of a Madden playoff game after all those regular season ups and downs are probably equal to if not greater than the NFL playoff nerves. Especially when the computer just starts cheating to make things close or your go-to plays stop working (or disappear from the game. RIP QB Waggle). If you lose in the real life NFL playoffs, you still get paid. If you lose in the Madden playoffs, all that remains is that feeling of emptiness. Trust me I went through the highs and the lows of it all is about a month’s time.

And don’t give me the “You can reset Madden but not real life before a loss”. We have a little thing called integrity here in the Casa de Clem. Plus I feel like that doesn’t work in the new Maddens anyway. Not that I tried or anything.

However I will say that Snacks playing as the Packers disappoints me, even though he must know Green Bay inside and out. Or at least which guys have the highest speed ratings. But how do Snacks not play with the GMen? Odell is a fucking monster, Snacks gets to play as himself in the game (every red blooded American’s dream), and Virtual McAdoo is a piece of goddamn art.

I hope Snacks isn’t that guy that always chooses the Packers or Patriots or Seahawks whenever he plays online. Those people are the absolute pits. And while making the playoffs every season is impressive, any difficulty lower than All-Pro is flat out unacceptable. I love Snacks for all he is. From his comically humongous thumbs to his fake teeth mouthpiece to his utter DOMINANCE on the defensive line. I just hope he isn’t a Madden weenie.

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