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THE TEXAS RANGERS ARE WORLD SERIES CHAMPIONS

Great duel from Gallen and Eovaldi. Great elimination game all around. Maybe not the sexiest World Series based on watchability, ratings, storylines, general interest and really any other measurable factor that transcends us baseball lunatics. But not horrible. 

I've seen better. 

There's been worse. 

None of that really matters though because the Texas Rangers are World Champions for the 1st time in club history. Nolan Ryan could've probably recorded the last out if we're being honest. The stars have been aligned for this club since Bochy came out of retirement. 

There's a lot to say about the 2023 Texas Rangers. The most important is that you can buy their merch right here

The next important thing. 

The Rangers are the exact reason you should complain about your owner for being a cheap pussy. Not even two years ago, the Rangers unloaded half a billion in free agency after losing 102 games. They were active at the deadline. They drafted and developed their own guys including the front office transition to Chris Young. They've been relentless in their pursuit of the Houston Astros within their own division and it's blossomed into a World Series Championship. 

Again. 

If your owner is a cheapskate lowlife pussy. By all means. Let this fuel your passion into the offseason. 

If you're a sincere Diamondbacks fan, nobody feels bad for you. 

If you're a Rangers fan, obviously consider some of that fine merchandise. And obviously enjoy yourself tonight. In order of Rangers you should be toasting: 

1. Corey Seager

2. Corey Seager

3. Corey Seager

4. Nathan Eovaldi

5. Corey Seager

6. Jon Gray

7. Brucre Bochy

8. Jankowski

If you can spell Jankowski by the end of the night then you're not going hard enough.

Other observations:

- Gallen looked so unhittable he had a no hitter into the 7th. Velocity down but the bite and command was there. Very impressive stuff and you can see a notably more engaged lower half. 

- Eovaldi's splitter is fuckin GROSS 

- Bruce Bochy is a magician 

Blah blah blah go buy some merch. Congrats to Rangers fans and Congrats to Creed. More insightful stuff coming just go have a couple cold ones for now