Father's Day Collection | T-Shirts, Hats, Polos, Crewnecks, Q-Zips and MoreSHOP NOW

Advertisement

Big Win For Chicago As Legal Sea Foods Announces Takeover Of Dick's Last Resort On The River

FSR - Legal Sea Foods, the beloved New England seafood brand with over 25 locations along the East Coast, announced its first brick-and-mortar Chicago restaurant, now officially under construction. The new market entry marks a significant milestone not only for Legal Sea Foods, but also for parent company, PPX Hospitality Brands, which includes another iconic Chicago restaurant, Smith & Wollensky, famously anchored next-door at the base of Marina City along River North.  

 Located at 315 N. Dearborn Street, along the vibrant Riverwalk in the bustling River North neighborhood at the famous landmark, Marina Towers, Legal Sea Foods’ newest restaurant will be positioned to take advantage of the best that Chicago has to offer, including breathtaking views overlooking the river and close proximity to the city’s top attractions. Legal Sea Foods Chicago is poised to become a must-visit destination for locals and visitors alike. The new restaurant follows the success of the brand’s virtual kitchen that was set up in Chicago in 2020 to “test the waters.” Operating out of the Smith & Wollensky kitchen, the PPX team recognized a healthy mid-west appetite for quality, fresh New England style seafood Legal is famous for.

This is big news and don't let the haters tell you otherwise. 

Yes, Legal Sea Foods is a machine now and no longer the quaint little Boston seafood spot everybody grew up loving. That doesn't change the fact they started out as one of the premier fish vendors at Inman Square in Cambridge in the '50s. They opened the first restaurant next door to the market in the late 60s and became the name (besides other legends like Union Oyster House, Anthony's Pier 4, and my fav, "No Name Restaurant") for seafood in Boston. No small title. 

The haters will tell you they're overrated, and fell off, and sold out, and went corporate after expanding outside of Boston. Basically calling Legal Sea Foods the Dave Portnoy of restaurants. But the haters can suck it, because much like the Portillo's haters in Chicago, they're just spoiled brats looking for something to bitch about. 

Advertisement

Legal's Clam Chowder is so fucking good it's served at the White House every inauguration day. Think about that.

Mass Live - Every presidential inauguration since President Ronald Reagan's first in 1981 has included New England clam chowder, made by Legal Sea Foods.

"Oh, congratulations on your inauguration Mr. President; you're now the leader of the Free World. Here's your first meal, a delicacy from the state that invented America."

They're not serving fucking Panera is what I'm saying. (And I love Panera) So the fact there's a very large amount of assholes in New England (with giant dumps in their pants) hating on this place, is the equivalent to the same type of negative Nancys we have out here in Chicago who hate on Dick Portillo and Portillo's for the same exact thing. Being too good, too big, and "selling out". 

Personally, I adhere to the old proverb that "in the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king."

As much as I fucking LOVE Joe's Stone Crab, there are only so many times you can go to it a month and fork over a week's salary for shellfish and lobster. (I have to check with my guy Johnny Stramaglia over at Supreme Lobster, but no joke I think lobsters might be like $20 a pound wholesale out here in the midwest). 

And I am not saying that Legal Sea Food is going to somehow solve the riddle of shipping freshly caught fish out of the water that morning and to the restaurant for dinner that night, but I am already paying an obscene amount of money to Goldbelly and LegalSeafood.com to stockpile my freezer with clam chowder on a regular basis. I'm telling you yes it's that good, and no, you can't get it just anywhere.

Advertisement

But my dicks not rock hard just for the clam chowder. 

LOOK AT THEIR FUCKING CRAB CAKES!!! 

YOU SEE ANY BREADCRUMBS OR BULLSHIT FILLING IN THERE? NOPE. NADA. THAT'S ALL LUMP MEAT AMIGO.

Also, TWIN STUFFED LOBSTER TAILS BABY!

A fisherman's platter that you'd sell your own mother for

Advertisement

And last but not least, an item that has evaded me my entire time living in Chicago, something I for some reason cannot find no matter how far outside the city I look… clam strips.

I don't know why nobody carries these or has them on their menu out here, it's not like it's some secret east coast thing. But man oh man, whenever I go back home in the summer the first thing I can't wait to order from the greasiest summertime seafood shack I can find (shout out Redwood, Clam Box, Spunkys, and Baxters) are clam strips. 

Fucking amazing. 

And oh yes, although their lobster roll isn't on the level of Neptune Oyster's, you definitely wouldn't kick it out bed and it will probably reign supreme here once it's street legal.

Advertisement

Am I gonna miss Dick's Last Resort? You bet your ass. There's only so many places you can go to dine and drink in a city where the servers verbally abuse you and draw penises on your paper hats. It's a shame they're dying out but something tells me these younger generations don't deal so well with that kind of business model. R.I.P. Dick's, you will be missed. 

p.s. - the time the boys and I hit Supreme Lobster for a behind the scenes tour