Antonio Brown Releases Yet Another DM From Tom Brady That Reveals the GOAT is a Billion Times the Man He Is

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We can say this for Antonio Brown. He understands the spirit of the holiday season. Not enough to actually practice peace on Earth and goodwill toward men, mind you. But enough to show us a perfect example of it, authored by his frienemy Tom Brady. 

And in doing so, demonstrate once again what was obvious to everyone years ago. Everyone other than Brady, that is. That being that Brown is a dirt bag. A petty, small-minded, ungrateful, spiteful, immature, vindictive, purile, worthless little goblin without a subatomic particle of decency in his athletically gifted body. An absolute ingrate with no regard for anyone who has ever tried to treat him well. 

Not that this is the first time he's released some of these private messages in a feeble attempt to make Brady look foolish:

And now, as then, the result has been the exact opposite. This is AB flexing on himself. Committing an own goal. It's as if Brady is releasing these himself in order to say, "This is what I tried to do for this guy." And the truly deranged thing is that once again, Brown thinks that the rest of us will read this and think Brady is the asshole, when it has the directly opposite effect. 

I'll say what I said the last time this came up. In my life I've never gotten a message this kind, this thoughtful, this supportive, from the guys I've been friends with since elementary school. Brown gets a bunch of them and thinks the rest of us will see this and react with a full-body eye roll like he is. When all it does is confirm what a great friend Brady is and what an irredeemable dipshit AB is.

Brown is a misanthropic, evil jagoff. He's the Grinch, living in a cave all by himself, unable to stop obsessing over Brady Who and can't figure out why he's so positive all the time. He's Scrooge, with nothing but contempt for the Cratchits being so happy instead of wallowing in lonely misery like him. I'd compare him to the Wet Bandits, but at least they were funny as they kept getting their brains bashed in by Kevin's booby traps. Brady's thoughtfulness is its own defense against Brown's attacks. 

And the truly pathetic thing is he'll keep releasing these. Of that I have no doubt. Because I'm sure there are dozens more where this one came from. And everyone of them is a self-own. All I ask is that Brady block his number. Because I wouldn't put it past Brown to take him up on his invitation to call. 

P.S. Eventually I'll come around to forgiving Brady for leaving us on St. Paddy's Day, 2020. But I'll never forgive him for throwing a Super Bowl touchdown pass to this asshat.