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Lighten the Fuck Up! At His First Convention in Las Vegas the Newly Elected Union President...

Michael Bezjian. Getty Images.

Ken was recently elected president of the teacher's union at his high school and while at his first big national convention in Las Vegas he decided to check out the local brothels… 

When he got to the first one, he asked the madam, "Is this a union house?"

 "No, I'm sorry, it isn't" the madam replied.

"So, if I pay you $100, what cut does the girl get?" Ken asked curiously…

"The house gets $80 and the girl gets $20" the madam informed him.

Mightily offended at such unfair dealings, Ken stomped off and went down the street in search of a more equitable brothel. His search continued until finally, he reached an establishment where the madam answered, "Why yes, this is a union house." 

"So, if I pay you $100, what cut does the girl get?" Ken again asked curiously…

"The girl gets $80 and the house gets $20." the madam proudly replied.

"That's more like it!" Ken said excitedly. 

Ken eyed each available girl and then pointed to a stunningly attractive redhead with a rockin' body standing against the wall in the middle of the room and said to the madam, "I'd like to take her for the night…" 

"I'm sure you would, sir," the madam replied while gesturing to a well-traveled 70-year-old gray-haired woman half-asleep in the corner, "but unfortunately, Ethel here has seniority…"

* Vindog has been repurposing jokes since 1968